Visiting My Grand Mother

Perhaps it is hard for westerners to understand why Chinese are so into visiting ancesters' tomb or so keen to be buried in the family burial ground (meaning, having your name engraved in a piece of wood, which is the ancestral tablet and is displayed in the family temple).

There is really no concept of religion in Chinese culture. The Chinese characters of religion was borrowed from Japanese in 19th century. It means "ancester" and "doctrine". I don't want to do too deep on the definition of Chinese way of religion comprehension, I
think it could as well be a doctorial paper in anthropology.

Chinese babies were born with a very big selfhood. A new born has to take its ancestral history, land, custom, expectation and unfinished dreams. It is also expected to continue the family line forever. This is dying donw as Chinese societies modernise but it roots deeply in our bloodstream. Religions are not such an important part of Chinese' every-day life because ancestral worship practice sort of fulfills the spiritual needs. To my father, the meaning of life is to glorify the family, it is not surprising that we don't communicate with each other very well because I like to make money more. Ha ha ha...

We picked up uncle Thomas and auntie Feng first and then drove to the mountain. I guess my grand mom would be the last generation of our family to be buried (I secretly planned things for my parents and myself already).

Her final resting place is so big and well-maintained. But don't be mistaken, it's definitely not like the cemetaries in the church yard in the west. Chinese cemetaries are spine-chilling. They are
usually located in mountain with very good view (essentials of good Feng-Shui). Just imagine the whole mountain has no living things but well-groomed trees and us. The sky was grey and cloud is heavy.

We walked into the tomb area as if we are about to enter her residence. It has a small temple for the local god. We have to offer him some food, incense and paper money. And then to my grand mom. The tea is poured over the ground as if she is drinking it. The burning of paper money is my favorite part, the only legal time for kids to play matches apart from Chinese New Year's fireworks.

We had to report to her what we are doing and all the gossips among relatives as if she could hear us well. I think that's the way for shy Chinese to communicate among family members.

We stubornly think our ancesters would watch over us if we treat them right. I guess I will continue doing so and pass it along with no logical explanations, I just think it is the right thing to do.