Luxury Goods Heaven

Tokyo office are very socialable. Hiroko has taken me to play walleyball (not valleyball), drinking/eating was happening almost every day, I start to switch into vacation mode... Well, that makes me feel so guilty

We finished at least 10 bottles and started singing together on the street on our way back (I also provided the backup dancing entertainment).
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I think it has a lot to do with my upbringings, I always feel reluctant to pay extra bucks for quality, no matter how small the amount is. My mom had not demanded a lot about her living space until recently (trust me, you won't feel like to decorate your home if it is an open space for all your husband's relatives/friends/business partners). Besides, we had to live a very economical life. It doesn't seem wrong at that time, I thought every one is doing the same thing. Mankit and I grew up strong and healthy, no complaints.

During my personality molding period in Canada, the people I knew were mostly penny counting. Auntie Feng is the only exception, she is the true believer of "you have to treat yourself well". Anyways, some of my friends were co-op students, the work term's earning is used to pay for the study term. Some were VISA students, cutting down the living expense means less the burden on their parents' shoulders in Taiwan/HK.

It almost became a competition among us, how to sustain the minimum student life yet have great time. Things were not getting better after I started working. I don't know what my Toronto friends have become, but I still live in the poor grad-student mode although I can definitely afford to treat myself better.

If I am in the supermarket, I would be drawn to the SALE section by an unexplainable force. Although there is usually bad-looking fruits or almost-overdue produce. I always try to get the cheap cut even though the difference is less than 10 yuan (slightly more than a dollar). When shopping for shampoo, it is unthinkable for me to buy from the BODY SHOP or the alike. They are 3 times more expensive than those chemical-ridden, mass-production shampoo. But after reading the price tag, I have changed my mind and gone back to buy cheapo shampoo 3 or 4 times. I hope I can success in buying the natural, organic shampoo next time. After reading the price list of the laundry service in the hotel, I decided to wash them in the bath tub. This really doesn't make sense to me, because the client is paying. I cannot explain why I love to abuse myself for no one's benefit. Why I do not know how to justify the marginal values purchased by the extra money? Or if I know but don't want to admit it is going to make my life better?

I think this is really the key to my whole attitute about spending. I * AM * NOT * CONFIDENT *. I don't trust myself that I am making a good deal and it is going to make me happy. Perhaps I hate to be haunted by the "spending-unwisely" experience, I have unconsciously washed out all my shopping impulse?

I envy those who can spend few hundred bucks on a handbag or a jar of night cream. They are so certain about the what they want... I guess life is a series of decision making, and shopping is one of them. We are all trying to make the best bargain by gathering information, waiting for the right time and then strike. I think I am just lack of training in the shopping department.