Everything can go Blastic and Gone the Next Second

I was very upset by the news that my friend has been diagnosed Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia a couple of weeks ago and very ill. Young (a year or 2 younger than I) and energetic, we used to play basketball in the parking lot when working in Mountain View together (cannot jump very high though). American Born Chinese, bright teeth and shy smile. He was an obssessive gym goer, we used to make fun of his muscles. He later moved to London and has been trapped since

I think it is the abruptness that strikes me hard. We all know that unexpected happens in life and we are educated to accept it. But it is another story when it does happen. I was so upset and talked to a colleague. He said, his high school mate, the star of local basketball team, was attacked by A.L.L. From diagnosis to burial, one month. Thanks for the information!

I don't know what I can do to help, that depresses me.

Middle-Class Japan

Reading a blog which describes the taxi drivers in Taipei now mostly are polite and well-educated. This worries the blogger, only during the recession, over qualified taxi drivers are seen. When in Taiwan in May, I was shocked to learn the news that south Korea passed the legislation to allow Taiwanese earning Korean Wan. Is Taiwan going to be another philippine, which the most famous export is its labour?

Tokyo taxi drivers are usually in their 50s, dressed in suits and maticulously white gloves. Equiped with GPS and automated doors, Tokyo taxi ride experience is only parallable by London black cab (it took London black cab drivers 3 year apprenticeship to acquire a license). They are firece drivers, never let the stereotype Japanese characteristics fool you, they are merciless and roam around town like F1 car racing drivers.

Japan is proud of its large portion of middle class. Middle class is not only limited to the white collar but also includes labourous workers. Artisans are found in every area, from cake baking to kimono making. Farmers or fishmen are especially well taken care of by the government in attempt to secure votes. The living standards is not drasically different between janitors and office workers, who rush to crowded trains every morning, slurp ramen for lunch and go to Izakaya with mates after work. This structure is the anchor of a stable society. However, as a part of this society, individual is less prompted to challenge or change a built-in and ready-made system (too comfortable to feel the need, yeah, something is missing but cannot quite tell what it is).

Japanese middle class need to have certain type of cars, wardrobe, houses and wives. Is it an attempt to be accepted by others so individual can feel secured?

Loose, undisplined and unorganised Taiwan v.s. Rigid, displined and organised Japan

Whenever being a guest in my Japanese friends' house, I am always amazed by the wonderful breakfast. The rice is hot and miso soup is definitely hearty. Together with some pickled veggie or dried fish. The eggs were always cooked in the most presentable shape, just like those plastic sample outside of Japanese restaurants. In Irene's house, the julian-cut potatos and carrots were wrapped inside bacon, pan-fried until crispy. The salad were placed in the nice bows, radish and carrots were thinly slices into one uniform size. The mother in law and Irene were busy in the kitchen when I was sleeping sound upstair!

I felt very embarrassed thinking about my cooking the night before, my cucumber salad were made of roughtly sliced red onion (the thickness varies). Thank God that Irene dealt with the cucumbers. The mazzarella cheese + tomato slices were totally unpresentable (they come out in different shapes and sizes)! Come to think about it, we Taipei kids were rarely raised in a full-time housewife home. Our foods were as not presentable as our mothers' cooking.

Most of my friends' mothers work and most of my friends carried keys to their homes. I was the lucky few exceptions since my home is also my father's factory and company. My mother is the receptionist, factory worker, chef and cleaner. I never carried keys until moving to Canada. Only very few of my friends enjoyed the freshly prepared breakfast, frequently cooked by grand parents. Large portion of us bought breakfast from the street vendors or bakery shops. Our lunch boxes were made of leftovers from dinner the night before.

Is this the reason why Taiwanese are loose and sloppy because the environment we grew up was not refined? The duties of family members were not rigidly defined? In Japanese version of family, the mother manages finance, father earns the bread and kids study. But in Taiwanese version of family, both parents are busy making money, mother is also looking after the finance (but she is also the bread earner, the viewpoints are very different), sometimes the kids cook, clean and take care of the old after school.

A mother is the soul and spirit of a household. She sets the tone of a family and defines direction of kids' education. In Japanese culture, the mother is supposed to devoted herself to her family by cleaning the house, cooking fresh breakfastm creating a neat, clean, perfect environments for future pillars of a society. Yet the concept of women should stay home remains the mainstream thinking.

Nagoya is Famous for its Chicken

Um... I am OK with fish but don't really want to eat them. I prefer watching them.
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I was talking to my colleagues at lunch asking why Japanese would not have more babies, replied there is no enough infrastructure to care for babies. In many East Asian countries that household help is common, women continue working after having kids. Even in US the nursary would take babies as young as 6-month old.

Those mentioned above are not possible in Japanese society. It is unthinkable for a Japanese family to have live-in outsider or kids need to be at least 3 years old to be sent to the daycare center. Japanese housewives (strictly speaking, a wife is also considered an outsider) were forced to stay home to care for the young, the old and clean.

Women were driven out of salary earning world yet there is no one wants to have babies. Who is going to support the old people?

Fugitive and Outlaw

When I was a high school kid, I was reading Zhang Da Chuan (張大春)'s book about the outlaw gang living in the mountain yet close to the city and farm in northen China. Their survival depends on looting the villiage and pass-by travellers. They are originally farmers. But farming cannot meet their end's need becasue of draught or wars or heavy tax. They are fugitives in some ways. I fell in love with those rustic, awkwardly simple, countrified and blunt language and their humurous attitute toward the bitterly harsh condition of life.

(Um... Beijing is somehow like that, but living in the city is another matter). The people were not educated, all they know is to rob or obtain wealth by threatening of violence. The group is bounded together by being honest and fair within a group. They nickname "going to the prison" as "going to school", in which those felons would learn the meaning of life (or a better skill to rob).

Just got another book, 我和我的土匪奶奶, setting in the similar era (from the time Chin dynasty collapsed before communist took over China). A female looter picked up a dying baby in one of her trip outsite their base, the little kid was raised into a leader of the gangsters. It is really too bad that I cannot translate the funny bits and pieces of this book into English. Not only you would have to read Chinese but you would also need to have enough sence of humor to appreciate the beauty of how Chinese survived in such an envrionment.

I did feel sad as I turn a page, "I am one more page closer to the end of the book :-((".

Japanese Client

The regitration hall in Taipei. Irene was as thin as a piece of paper.

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I am in the love hate relationship with my Japanese client in Tokyo. Working in Tokyo is always like taking a vacation. Unlike my other clients, who wants to make sure they are making the most bang of their money. Japanese clients are very relax. With my Malaysia clients, my presence in the project room was maticulously timed. The project manager would pop in the project room from time to time to see if I am slacking (that's rarely the case, they usually throw me more than I can chew). Some even asked for a meeting on daily basis so she can monitor my progress (in her own words, she wants to provide assistance and didn't want me to waste time investigating solution if getting stuck).

Things are so different in Tokyo. They wouldn't want me to attend meetings, my Tokyo colleagues would go to the meeting and come back with clients' requirements. I am basically free to do whatever I want while waiting before a confirmed specification can be signed off (which is never the case, Japanese clients never want to sign off anything).

That is the bad thing about working for Japanese. In Japanese clients' mind, there is never an end to a project, no one dares to declare a projectd is finished. In Japanese term, "Customer is God". We dutifully work out whatever they wish to have. Of course we would like to go extra mile to show our good wills, however, I do feel that we are being too nice and going too far. The side effect of this is usually a lengthy and overly engineered structure. When the consultant has gone or the clients' risk officier has left the position, the system would normally be abandoned.

I was told this is Japanese way, a project definition document is only used as reference. The clients like to put things into our mouth (you or your sales person promised this last time we talked) and, therefore, we have to deliver although it is not included in the contract.

Definitely not a healthy way of running a project (no guarantee to meet the deadline and budgt)yet Japanese clients seem OK to bear the extra cost.

The Matter of Pretty Face

Christine's baby is so cute!

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I have read that one employer once said to the journalist that he likes to hire beautiful people because they are usually much more confident. This brings out a lot of good quality of themselves and the people they work with. Also, performing well in your job doesn't guarantee you a promotion, being likable does.

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I have seen a lot of pretty girls when growing up (XiaoHo is the only pretty boy I have seen so far, something is very wrong with Taiwanese guy). All girls I grew up with had their prettiness. Some had the best skin and long limbs, some had beautiful facial figure and slim body. However luck I have, I have really got nothing to boast about. My teenage era was the dark period of my life. Not particularly good looking in anyway yet I was so atheletic that my bodybuild was never delicate and slim, which was not very marketable among boys. Self-esteem was very low because I've got no secret admirers.

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Anyways, I do agree that pretty people are usually more confident and fun. They are popular and always the teacher's favorite. Some of them are cruel in making fun of less-pretty people. I was too sensitive to be made fun of, so I worked out my way of being popular (by simply being myself, maybe). Some are really beautiful but refused to admit the power brought by their appearance. Some skillfully used it in a way that you don't find it offensive (or being taken advantage of, ha!).

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Somehow I gradually accept the fact that I am not pretty. I think, as you age, the personality charm plays a higher hand. Not becacuse of your appearance deteriorate but your characteristics become more pronounced. It is a real disaster to see uninteresting beautiful women (nevertheless men are always fine with them).

Tough Consultant

I just met the most unhelpful consultant in our organisation. She is in this business for very long time and her principle is never being nice and friendly to client/colleagues. For example, god forbid that I asked her if she knows under what project we should book our time in, she would say "Why you ask me? You should ask the project manager." When clients asked her for help, she would say "I've told you to do it this way, things went wrong because you didn't follow my instruction". She is very tough in never compromising, never giving in to clients pleads or requests. She doesn't care if clients complain about her, the experienced treasury consultant is always in demand. However, she is good in pushing the project forward and meeting the deadline (somehow she pressures clients to sign off), I cannot deny it. She is good at her job.

But working with her is definitely not a pleasant experience. Every time she says no, my anger just climbs one level higher (especially the no was said to my direction).

In fact, she meant good and what she was doing was terribly politically correct. But her delivery is just bloody awful. Do you have to behave like a spider (so everyone wants to smash you) in order to push a project forward?

Something is missing from Irene's Wedding

I forgot to mention a very interesting thing happened in Irene’s engagement lunch banquet. We had 3 tables for relatives and friends. Of course Aoki’s family shared the table with Irene’s family.
Midway through, Aoki, Aoki’s sister and mum left the table quietly without saying any word. I was so entertained but couldn’t quite figure out what’s going on. When they left, everyone else continued eating and chatting, as if nothing has happened. I asked the Taiwanese friends what’s going on, he replied this is the Taiwanese custom in engagement banquet.

He explained further, the groom’s family is taking a big advantage of taking the daughter away from the bride’s family. Also, traditionally the engagement party was funded by the bride’s family. It would be really too much for the groom’s family to finish all the food on the table. Thus, as the symbolic apology, they have quietly leave the table when the fish dish comes (PS1), and leave some red envelops under the tea cup.


PS1. Generally, the banquet dishes starts with some cold cuts, then soup, fried veggies, meat, some sort of strews, fish, noodles/rice and desert.