When the upper beam is not level, the lower beam tilts

This is an old Chinese saying, implying if the parents or seniors are not setting up the correct model for the yongsters, they tend to wrong doings.

One day I went back to Taipei, Mankit was so eager to show me something and took me to the kitchen. He kept saying this old Chinese saying which I didn't quite comprehend at the time. He then pulled open 4 or 5 carboard doors that is around knee to hip height. And then, XiaoHo came in, quickly closed all doors... with his right foot. I then realised that my mom sometimes close the carboard door or touch off the TV set switch with her foot while she is holding XiaoHo.

Headscarf

In Kuala Lumpur, most mulsim women wear headscarves, even the 3 year old has the tiny scarf around her head. But it came in different shades and styles. Why is the religion so afraid of women exposing their hair? The common answer comes like it is to prevent provoking men's sexual thoughts. If men are so brainless that they can be aroused by women's hair? The teaching is really beyond me.

However, according to newsweek (in responding to some European countries' upheavals of headscarves), wearing headscarves was not in the original Muslim doctrines. It starts with the Arabic women trying to distinguish themselves from those non-believers.

I just feel that is the very useful tool to impede a girls' freedom. It is hard to imagine a headscarf-wearing girl going backpacking in south American countries... Well, she would die of starvation because nothing is halal anyways.

Wanatabe Junichi

I am reading Junichi's (渡辺淳一) essay collection. This guy was famous in writing story about extra-marital affair. One of his very popular work was the story a couple, each of them married to someone else, decided to end their shameless happiness in death. The novel was successful largely because Junichi has meticulously described the extreme ecstatic state of this couple's immoral sex. For them, there is no way out. Even if there is a way to be together, they can only see the passion and flame to die down. Thus, they decide to stop their whole world at the climax.

Junichi has some quite interesting ideas, such as being honest is never what we, as human beings, are very good at, that's why we were repeatedly told to be honest.

The Curse of Golden Flowers

It has been very very long time since I walked out of a movie last time. But I have not been to any movie for quite a while. Given the cynical level I am in now, I should be walking out of movies a lot more often if I were a regular movie goer.

I think this movie makes the end of Zhang YiMou. He is running out of tricks to lure westerners, not even Gong Li and Chow Yun Fat can breath hope into this piece of trash. There is no logic, no reasoning of why the king (Chow Yun Fat) wanted to kill the queen (Gong Li). Most scenes were taken place in the too colourful, obsessively ornated interior of a palace. I wonder how that feels to wake up in such a place after a long night of drinking.

The history background was all so wrong, since the background was set in the late Tang dynasty (around 9th centry), where the empire was split into 5 large clans and 10 other smaller clans. And then, the palace scene was film in forbidden city, which only became the capital after Yuan dynasty (13th century). The only eye-catching scene is how those parlor maids dressed in Tang dynasty fashion, showing off their breasts in everyway they can. They dress in something very similar to the western corset, which squeezes up the 2 pockets of white meat, that trembles while the ladies walk. It is actually a scary scene, I am telling you. But I admire Zhang's effort to find so many pretty looking girls with delicate skin.

If Zhang is trying to impress the west with the fantasy-like late-Tang dynasty culture, he should have paid more attention to the details. Even I can tell, in the close up, the handkerchif Gong Li used to dry up her sweat looks like the cheap nylon sold in sourvernir shop in Bejing Capital airport.

The Mask of Mr. Polite

It is not unnatural to see a someone wearing mask on the street/office/department stores in Japan. It might be because the person is coming down with a cold or just sneezes too much. I think it is because that you might spray the bacteria when sneezing and get your colleagues sick as dog for days. Whether it works or not is not important, it is more important that you have shown that you care.

My mom said that she felt that she was scrutinised when touring around Japan few years ago. Well, I guess that's because she definitely looks different from other Japanese middle age women yet she is not western looking. Perhaps the scrutinisation is more like a wondering, what is made of this middle-age women with no make up, no heels and no hudsband accompanied?

I have read about Japanese culture, such as that lady should not make a sound when peeing and it is impolite to blow your nose in public. It is all coming about the guilty feelings that my action might make others to feel uncomfortable. Perhaps the rule of thumb is "if you don't want to be treated in a certain way, then prevent yourself from treating others the way". However, I guess I prefer the girl in the stall next to me is peeing rather than playing with the toilet flush (they overuse the flush to hide the sound). How the custome started at the first place? That would be a interesting thing to know.

Anyhow, I try not to hold it in if there is someone else in the lady's room in the office. I would clean the toilet seat, pretend to struggle with the zipper, etc until the other person has left. I guess I am more self-concious then I thought I am.

The Essential of Being Honest

Yanagi san and Akiko took me out playing pachinko at my last night in Tokyo. I am really curious to see the weird elements in Japan. It is said, the combination of pinball and slot machine place is the hangout for them. I even read the section in the tour book explaining how to play Pachinko. "Smoking is compolsury because you have nothing to do other than letting the little steel balls eat away your investment". But we went to the big arcade, which is not a real Pachinko place, because Yanagi san thinks that suits my age more. Sigh...

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I am always very curious about what are behind morality. What makes us tell right from wrong (whether to do the right thing or wrong is the other question). I guess we all feel the pressure to behave in a way that's acceptable by our society. Following the rules or common sense would guarantee you not being bother by stranger's dirty looks, elders' displine or law enforcement.

The moral standard is then formed by the rule - I am a good man/woman suppose doing all that agreed by society. Cool, women wearing scarf is moral, because it is a sin not to wear it in Koram. Actually, that's the only counter example that comes to my head at the moment.

But I was told a piece of information that washing your hands after toilet is actually washing away the anti bacteria substance our hands produce. It is not good for your own health, but I am not sure whether it is going to be a threat to those who religiously wash their hands. Do we do this because we are concerned to bring disease to others?

At least for me, washing hands after toilet is a show for your fellow toilet goers. Nevertheless, I've grown used to washing hands even there is no one else to inspect me (Relax, my friends, my hands were alright clean when picking up the french fries from your plates).

Anyways, I asked people whether you would give back the extra change suppose the teller has made a mistake. Most people do. I think that's because we subconciously want to be given this allowance when we make such a silly mistake? What if you realise the world is not as forgiving as we were told? Would you still give back the change?

Nationalism Franatics

I have read somewhere that a Japanese soldier's young wife killed herself right next to her sleeping husband so that he can wake up in her blood because she wanted to encourage him to completely devote himself to the country and not to be distracted by missing her. He became the cruelest warrior in China during world war II.

Hotel Survival Guide (2)

6. A pair of scissors

You will never know how important it is to have a pair of scissor in your room. And it is quite odd to ask for one from the front desk (they gave you this strange look as if you are going to disect some frogs in the bath tub). Anyhow, it is just so useful beyound your imagination. For example, you just bought a pair of nice jeans and really want to wear it to the pub downstair. However, the price tag stripe was so strong that the mediocre toy scissors in the sewing kit wouldn't do a thing. Or you would like to cut/pry/stab open the canned peanuts from the mini bar (for some reason, the easy-open can is very easy and the handle is very easy to break). You just need to be careful that a pair of scissor might destroy your plan not to check in any luggage.


7. Nail files

The worse way to find out that there is a sprinter coming out of your thumb nail is when the sprinter pulls a tiny, wheeny thread out of your stockings when pulling them up/down. You can basically do nothing but feel depressed for a minute. Man, that's the second pair today. You need to fix any split ends or suspicious disarray in your nails, aggressively and obssessively.

8. hat and socks made of thick, warm, soft materials

Remember the stronger than normal air conditioning (as if electricity doesn't cost them a dime, of course, we pay for it). There is a danger to get very very sick by catching a cold, especially in Kuala Lumpur. The temperature contrast is too huge. Toward the end of my stay, I had to switch off the air condition at night, however, feeling suffocated in the morning. The trick I use is to wear a wool hat and socks, put on my only jumper before going to bed. This really works!

9. Chopsticks

I once bought some nice cup noodles back to the hotel, thinking to spend my night with happy web surfing and hot noodles. When my favorite web blog is on and noodles are done, I only came to realise that the d*mned 7-11 didn't give me chopsticks. My only 2 choices are my fingers and the pen. I used the pen at the end because the noodles was really too hot, hey, I chew my pen anyways, what is the difference?

10. Painkiller

Do I have to say anything more about this?

11. Wine opener

I remember one time my friends and I were trying anything handy to open a wine bottle desperately in the skiing carbin. We used screwdriver, hair pin, steak knifeThe cork remains were floating on top of the surface of wine in our glasses and bottle.

Hotel Survival Guide

If you are planning to stay in one hotel for more than 1 week, there are quite a few items that you should not forget to bring with you:

1. Super antiseptic cream, perferrably with steroid

Forget about how bad steroid can do to your skin, you don't want to set yourself in a completely unfamiliar environment with a huge acne on your nose (or near your nose). You need that confidence to arm your timidity in a foreign country. The cream can be used heavely at the pimple spot, be careful not to spread it around. Gee, just let this bit of skin burned, I don't care, as long as the pimple doesn't grow larger due to infection.

2. Toothpaste

The hotel toothpaste doesn't work, as simple as that. No matter how hard you brush, you cannot make foam out of it. You start to wonder whether you have mistaken the lotion for toothpaste, in fact, they taste like it, too.

3. Shampoo and conditioner

Those shampoo/conditioner/body washer bottles contain essentially identical matters. I think those are made of recycled real shampoo, conditioner, body wash and soap. The shampoo can easily destroy your hair. Remember I once washed my hair with body wash before moving out of London? How my hair became tangled, sticky and hard as steel wire? That's how I feel about hotel shampoo.

4. Very strong body lotion

Because most hotel rooms are seriously sealed (afraid of guests jumping off the window?). The constantly activated aircondition is really bad for your skin. My case was a bit serious, I start to grow rashes all over my thighs and back. It was really hard to suppress the urge to scratch during the meeting.

5. Gloves and detergent

2 weeks is relative long time to go without clean socks, you read the price list of the laundry service, such as 5 dollars for a pair of socks, I think, most people would decide to make the 5 bucks by drawning them in the bathroom sink. It is really handy to have a pair of thick gloves (so you can use the extra hot water to make sure all the genes are killed) and the real detergent (strickly speaking, body soap smells nice but very weak in cleaning fabric).


to be continued....

Luxury Goods Heaven

Tokyo office are very socialable. Hiroko has taken me to play walleyball (not valleyball), drinking/eating was happening almost every day, I start to switch into vacation mode... Well, that makes me feel so guilty

We finished at least 10 bottles and started singing together on the street on our way back (I also provided the backup dancing entertainment).
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I think it has a lot to do with my upbringings, I always feel reluctant to pay extra bucks for quality, no matter how small the amount is. My mom had not demanded a lot about her living space until recently (trust me, you won't feel like to decorate your home if it is an open space for all your husband's relatives/friends/business partners). Besides, we had to live a very economical life. It doesn't seem wrong at that time, I thought every one is doing the same thing. Mankit and I grew up strong and healthy, no complaints.

During my personality molding period in Canada, the people I knew were mostly penny counting. Auntie Feng is the only exception, she is the true believer of "you have to treat yourself well". Anyways, some of my friends were co-op students, the work term's earning is used to pay for the study term. Some were VISA students, cutting down the living expense means less the burden on their parents' shoulders in Taiwan/HK.

It almost became a competition among us, how to sustain the minimum student life yet have great time. Things were not getting better after I started working. I don't know what my Toronto friends have become, but I still live in the poor grad-student mode although I can definitely afford to treat myself better.

If I am in the supermarket, I would be drawn to the SALE section by an unexplainable force. Although there is usually bad-looking fruits or almost-overdue produce. I always try to get the cheap cut even though the difference is less than 10 yuan (slightly more than a dollar). When shopping for shampoo, it is unthinkable for me to buy from the BODY SHOP or the alike. They are 3 times more expensive than those chemical-ridden, mass-production shampoo. But after reading the price tag, I have changed my mind and gone back to buy cheapo shampoo 3 or 4 times. I hope I can success in buying the natural, organic shampoo next time. After reading the price list of the laundry service in the hotel, I decided to wash them in the bath tub. This really doesn't make sense to me, because the client is paying. I cannot explain why I love to abuse myself for no one's benefit. Why I do not know how to justify the marginal values purchased by the extra money? Or if I know but don't want to admit it is going to make my life better?

I think this is really the key to my whole attitute about spending. I * AM * NOT * CONFIDENT *. I don't trust myself that I am making a good deal and it is going to make me happy. Perhaps I hate to be haunted by the "spending-unwisely" experience, I have unconsciously washed out all my shopping impulse?

I envy those who can spend few hundred bucks on a handbag or a jar of night cream. They are so certain about the what they want... I guess life is a series of decision making, and shopping is one of them. We are all trying to make the best bargain by gathering information, waiting for the right time and then strike. I think I am just lack of training in the shopping department.

Laundry Disater

I am really not very good in doing other people's laundry (since all my clothes are already colour and size stablised). Peggy's mother's trousers have shrank into Peggy's size. Not only that, the left is 2 inch shorter than the right.

River Crabs

The famous River Crabs. They are considered the delicacy in late Autum. This is the time when the crabs grow fat to get ready for the long winter. Their meats tastes very light and sweet, goes very well with the mixture of rice vinegar, shredded young ginger, little suger and soy sauce. You have to eat a pair, male and female.

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Peg is making me shark fin soup and I have to go shop for the chicken for the soup base. The requirement is the organic farm chicken, less than 3 jin (1.5 kg). So I went to the chicken stall with a lot cages. I stood and observed, couldn't find any ready-killed chicken. I asked the stall keeper if you have any dead chicken.

"No, no, all of our chickens are nice and fresh and healthy" Replied the keeper in nervous voice.

I really didn't want a chicken to die because of me but had no other choice. But the chicken soup is really delicious.

ShangHai Peg

The second morning after arrived in ShangHai. Before putting on the foundation and mascara.

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I flew to ShangHai last Friday and have been very surprised by how similar ShangHai is to Taipei. Although this is not my first time here, I guess the contrast was more impressive after living in Beijing for more than 6 months. I remember when visiting ShangHai 2 years ago, I was so annoyed by the constant blaring of honk. Amazingly, I am now considering ShangHai streets are so peaceful and quiet.

The taxi drivers are more civilised (some of them even dress in suits and wears white gloves), the interior of taxis are generally clean and ordorless. I was told that taxis are heavily regulated. If you express any doubt whether the driver has taken you to a longer route, one yuan will be returned to you without argument. Your complaint to higher authority might make them lose their taxi license.

The city itself is more cosmopolitan and modern. Oh well, more shopping places to go. But people generally pay more attention to their appearance. The foods taste more delicate, with less salt and grease. The difference between north and south is dramatic.

I have read an article explaining the mentality difference between north and south. There is one quite interesting example. By law, taking a passenger in bycicle is forbidden. However, parents need to send their kids to school with this type of cheap and convenient transportation. In Beijing, parents carry their young with the bikes and policemen would choose to neglect the illegal act. In ShangHai, the city has passed a law to allow carrying a passenger, but the rider has to push the bike when crossing intersections.

Scaming southerners are everywhere in the world.

10 hours of sleep

Not feeling too well after coming back from KL. I guess the drasic change of temperature doesn't do me too good. Plus, the central heating didn't start until last night. My allergy/cold-like syndrom was getting bad, the violent sneezings woke me up almost every night.

The heating finally came and I guess my body has got used to the flu virus. I finally had a good night sleep, from 8pm to 6am. Wow... I can really sleep.

Crooked Taxi Driver

I cannot help but think all Texi drivers are somewhat crooked, perhaps we should exclude those in Japan or Britan. I have got a lot more unpleasant experience taking taxi after moving back to Asia, maybe, by large number theory, I am bound to meet with the nasty lots.
I think all texi drivers are trying very hard to make extra buck or two, which makes them, ur..., very aggressive. I read that the KL texi should run by meter, so I filtered those without meters. Finally I got on one texi with meter, but was told the meter is broken while departing the cab. I had to pay whatever comes up in the driver's random guess. Some drivers would purposely take you on a grand detour, the upside of it is that you can have a tour... but with someone you don't really know and fear what he might do to squeez out more money out of your pocket.
I am especially nasty to those taxi drivers without licenses and try to recruit customers from the street. Maybe they are just earning a living, but for some strange reason, they all look like criminals. In Beijing, at every train station, those dress in filthy clothes and flip-flops, not very well shaved, haircut at least 3 month overdue, would approach you saying "want a ride?". That scares the hell out of me without fail. I usually just walk away pretending not hearing anything at all.
This morning, while I am trying to leave for the airport, I had to take a taxi to the airport express train station. I would have taken the public transportation if they operate before 6. Anyhow, I walked out of the hotel where a line of taxis were waiting.. wait a minute, not in the destinated taxi waiting area but the road side. I wasn't very sure so I ask the porter, who indicated those taxis are ok (guess he has to live peacefully with thosenon-licensed drivers). Anyhow, I got on one cab, which charge me 3 times out of the normal rate since there is no meter. I just got off the cab and shout to the porter "they don't run by meter".
While waiting for my official cab, the negotiation continued. I insisted my official rate and amazingly, they wouldn't give up. My official cab finally came. To the KL Sentral, fine. During the ride, I was so worried again for no obvious reason. Does he understand me? Does he show me around the city again? Thankfully we arrived in the central station fairly quickly and the \fair was surprisingly low. I was so happy that I have made the right choice and then he turned to me saying this is the night rate, I have to pay double of the meter price because it is before 6am. Of course, no receipt.

Understanding English

I was woken up by a phone call around midnight. Not expecting to receive any calls, I quickly picked up the phone and threw back the receiver because I don't feel like to explain. Several theories were turning inside my head, who could that be? I made the conclusion it must be a wrong number.

But I couldn't fall back sleep, so I switched on the TV and found that it is playing Alfie. The movie is so lousy. A limo driver can afford Gucci suits, Prada shoes and a spacious housing in west village? The director's main mission is to show off the prettiness of Ju Law (and every one around him). Apart from the amazing courtship skills Alfie demonstrated, the movie has accomplished nothing.

However, I find it very hard to understand the dialog while watching the movie with Malay subtitles.

Malaysia is Happy?

I had the impression that Malaysian people are all very happy. They seem carefree in a way. I guess the language has a lot to do with this impression. The very surprising thing to learn is that the people from the three different major ethnic groups speak English with the same ancent. The short, impatient tone with only simple words (if the sentence can be done with kids language, no one seems to bother to put it in a formal and more adult-like). Things seem to be decided rather quickly comparing to other counties I have worked.

The local newspaper writes with a similar dynamics. Some of them reads like the example essays from high school. For example, there was an article about animation, it starts as "what makes a good animation? The good story line or the excellent technology?" Oh la la... That should be the sentence in my blog!

The Chinese in KL speak Cantonese or Mandarine in similar fashion, sentences are short and simple, with the funny upward tone at the end. I think among all other oversea Chinese, those in southern east asia have the broadest exposure to languages. They can speak at least 3 Chinese local dialets (Fukjian, Cantonese, ChaoCheow) , Malay and English. Some of them even knows bunjabi (spelling?)

The bank of Islam only hires Malay people obviously because I cannot see any Indians or Chinese. That was confirmed by the project manager, WeiVoon. This is a shocking discrimination if happening in US or UK. WeiVoon told me in very low voice that how unfairly Chinese have been treated. Or, rather, how the locals are being favored by government policies. Well, people like WeiVoon with Chinese origin (the 3rd generation), have to work extra hard to get to where she is now.

But as a middle class, you have a house, steady job and enough saving to afford a oversea holidays, whatelse would you ask more of?

Aquarium

Spending my 31st birthday in the hotel room, trying hard to imagine where the camera shot is going to have me inside the picture.

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It seems every male visitor in KL is having a good time. On the streets near the hotel, there are aways girls standing around, waiting to be picked up. You just need to be careful because sometimes those are lady boys (they can be identified by deep voice and masculine facial figure, however, they are extremely beautiful and slender). Quite a few westerners hold those small Malay women under their arms, almost like little girls carrying dolls. Where is the fun for female visitors? I have been thinking, what if man prostitutes are available and the act of picking up men from street become as acceptable as picking up women, would it become a business? I read an article once (maybe from Jim Roger's capitalist's venture), some European women go to Africa so to have some actions, and their bring condoms from their own countries.

I went to the KL aquarium this afternoon, fishes swimming is very theraputic. I cannot help but thinking most of them are already mental. They don't need to go around for food, confined in a small space, what are they thinking? Of course you cannot read fish's emotion from their face, but I cannot help thinking if they would express their ecstatics by swimming faster, roaming up and down from one end of the tank to another.

Or when they are really really bored, would they just stand still, you have to look very hard to see the movement of their fins. There is a type of Amazon fish, with a duck-like mouth, called paddle fish. They have not evolved for 500 million years. They swim with their mouth open, blindly sieving everything comes in their way. Could they spit out the food they don't like? There is also a very interesting English word I learnt today, those who study fish is called "ichthycologiest". I guess Manjit is going smile if he reads my blog.

On many streets in KL, there are so many different types of fruit trees. Coconuts, mangos and some local fruits I cannot name (but eaten). They are persistently growing inspite of ugly human intervention. Very deterministic.

I am staying in a very lousy hotel that has no internet service in guest rooms. It is all because the gynaecology convention is taking place in KL. There should be increasing number of young western men doing the pub claw at night, would they be interested in girls at all?

Touch Chinese Women

I would say woman rights in China is uncomparable among all other Asia countries. A lot of mportant government positions are taken by female, as I have described before, women in China are really tough.

When the sociaty doesn't require women to be womanly, you don't think it is important to have anner. You can see women shaking legs when sitting, spitting on the street, taking newspapers o the toilet so to tell everyone you are about to shit, walking like a man although dressing up. All these are really puzzling yet interesting.

As women and men behave alike, the line between hudsband and wife role in a Chinese household become also fussy. I only seeing it as an outsider, however, I had a chance to listen to what Chinese men think of those Taiwanese or Hong Kong wives quitting jobs and staying home after marriages.

He highly resented such behaviors and thought there is nothing wrong with a stronghead wife. His reason is so she can carry half of the household on her shoulder, which make his life much aslier. A very refreshing point of view...

The Rudest Air Hostess I have ever met

On my way to KL, I have to take the domestic chinese southern airline to GuangZhou for a ayover. There I've seen the rudest air stuardess. She is tall and slander, very pretty, however, good looking she is, she is impatient, without respect to the passengers and her own profession.

As I was boarding theflight, the carbin was very crowded and there is barely no room in the verhead compartment. I managed to squeeze in my hand carry while she stood over watching nd making the annoyed sounds like "tz, tz, tz". Such as she cannotbelieve I am bringing such a ig carry on to inconenient her peace. She speaks with thick old Beijing ancent, which blurs all words under the bottom of the mid part of a tongue. In short, she behaves like a adolescent boy please note, not a woman at all, I cannot see any womanly manner in her, which is very nteresting because she is very beautiful).

While distributing the meal, her tone of asking customers which meals were harsh and quizzical. I saw her throwing the meal tray back to the drawer when a fellow passenger asked for the lternative, and murmured "You demanded the alternative only now", the mumbling voice is ade loud so that every one can hear.

I am only curious how people can bear this type of treatment? Or is it because the customers are sometimes harsh so that the service has to be correspondingly bad?

In a restaurant, you can see people shouting at the waitrons for water or manu. There are no execuse me" or "please" or "thank you" (only in very rare condition do those words appear in onversations with strangers). Some mainlanders are really being looked at in Hong Kong airport restaurant when they do the same trick to the wait staff.

Is it true that Chinese is uncivilised to strangers yet too friendly to accquintances? Perhaps in he west, people are keeping rather the same distance to everyone, near or far. However, Chinese has drawn the very clear line between people known and unknown.

Chinese Medicine

I have always wanted to share some of my findings about Chinese medicine, however, this topic is too big and too complex. I can hardly imagine how I can explain this in one blogging article, should try my best though.

The root of Chinese medicine is really the balance of Ying and Yang. The two has their operating turf yet need to cooperate to metabolise (the Chinese medicine term is to vaporise, of course, not caused by high temperature in this context). The five elements -water, fire, metal, wood, soil are associated with kidney, liver, lung, stomach, heart. However, in the context of Chinese medicine, lung is not strictly only the organ, for example. It includes the skin and hair, which means everything involves in desposing waste. The system definition is not as clear cut as western medicine study. On top of the main five, there are another 6 containers, which are in the supporting roles. If the main fives are the kings, these 6 are the knights.

The five elements helps out one the other and surpress one the other and the same time. When sickness strikes, it is largely caused by one of the five elements gets too aggresive. The cure is to activate the element that's supposed to supress it and slow down the element that's supposed to breed it. Yet remember those 5 elements are also interwinded, if you keep thinking down how you can achieve the effect by controlling its breeding element and supressing element, you are going to fall into a frantic cycle!

Very neat, some of the example shows that constipation is linked to your lung. And how the doctor cured the labour complication by feeding the women the soup of a type of plants, whose fruits drop easily when mature.

Vicky's Wedding

Oops, I was brought to the state to sing a song by Vicky...














Very frightened, I made Vicky sing instead...

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In Chinese Wedding, it is a norm to play some silly games so to provide entertainment to the guests. I believe you would understand what I mean if you have watched Ang Lee's "the wedding banquet". Or if you are my faithful blog reader, the pictures from my cousin's wedding from last Christmas could also be the evidence.

I have seen very brutal games, such as making the bride move a raw egg inside the gloom's trousers, entering from leg and coming out from the other. The egg should come out intact. The higher level is to make her do it without hands!

Vicky had everythng under her control, I mean, she plans the entertainments herself, letting no chance for the guests to come up with any surprises. She even reversed the roles playing, gave out red envelope (with small notes in it) for those lucky guests to pick. But the guest had to perform, according to the instruction in the back of the envelope. I won my 20 RMB with great difficulty.

The foods were served in very different fashion than that in Taiwan. All foods from the appetisers to desserts almost came at the same time, the plates leveled with each other. I think it is more to show the abundance of foods rather than the taste of them.

Where would you sit

If taking a cab ride by yourself? I found another odd thing about Beijing is that many choose to sit next to the cab driver instead the back seat. Even girls do that. That's very puzzling... I thought the passenger side's seat is the worse seat if riding a cab along.

My Brain is Empty, too much Agatha Christie

We went for an easy hike on Sunday. The Xiang Mountain in the west end of Beijing city. The weather was much better than last time Alvaro and I went. We also picked the easy route instead of the 2,500 steps uphill trail.

However, the crowd was so unbearable. There were people everywhere, it is more crowded then the city center. We had to climb the 3-meter high wall and sneaked out to the other side of the wall (the park was fenced by the wall) in order to escape the madness.
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I like to observe those successful people. In my definition of being successful, they are happy about what they do, do it very well and the monetary reward comes as if that's something they didn't expect to get initially.

They are usually crazy, in a way, they are almost paranoid about their theories, ideas or right doing. unmeasurably confident, and consequently, very influential. The bit of craziness is not easily seen in many (I think the craziness is sometimes driven by deep unsatisfaction about what they are or what they are in). Once the craziness has taken them a step forward, they become more and more confident in their abnormality. Gee, the wheel start rolling....

Got to have passion, without passion, they look/act almost like a fool.

Return of Joey Liao

Wait, something is missing.....










Jen is missing! Jen is so busy growing protein in her lab but found a copy of Jen's Canadian citizenship card, so to bring it with us in our pajama party.

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Going back to Toronto after 5 years is such a thrill to me. Everything looks so familiar yet so distant. I still remembered my way around town, however, not the restaurants. I didn't have much luck eating my way around town until my aunt came to my rescue. She knows all the good Chinese restaurants in uptown, she even remember what to order and what not to order in every single one of them.

All my cousins have grown into young women, I still remember them as they were 12 years old. Nevertheless, they both look 12 years old. I was so shocked to realise Sandy has a boy friend (we had DimSum together, but I didn't give him a hard time, good Joey). However, Jennifer pays more attention to the protein then boys (quite a few of broken hearts).

Sandy obviously has a wider social circle. She has a friend who complains about everything in Toronto is mediocre, she claimed, even the scandals between politician are mediocre. I think there is nothing wrong of being average, I was just wondering how the hell I survived in Toronto before. Sandy takes the double majors in literature and biology. She works in the school newspaper as an editor. A very happy kid.

Those are 2 of my favorite Chinese who don't speak or write Chinese.

Hastenly Spken English

It is very interesting to listen to people talk in Kuala Lumpur. They rarely finish a whole sentense. The receipiant would always interpolate and acknowlege. Communication without full communication seems like a culture. It is almost natural not to express yourself fully.

The rapid rythm of speaking accentuate this impatient movement in conversation. You almost feel you are stupid if wanting to finish a statement with clear pronouciation and normal tempo.

Revenge of a Panda

Gu Gu, the panda in Beijing Zoo. Of course, Gu Gu is much bigger than this now
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The drunk Chinese guy felt the urge to hug Gu Gu, the Panda. He jumped into the panda enclosure and got bitten by Gu Gu in his left leg.
Don't hug anything you think cute.

Fear of Money

I went through the horrifying experience of wiring money out of China. It is not possible for foreigners to buy dollars with Chinese Yuan, unless you can provide 5 various types of documents to prove that your Yuan deposit comes from a earning, paid by a foriegn company. I then asked help from my Aussie colleague who needs to convert the dollars to Yuan.

I know the exchange rate is less than 8. I said I should buy the dollars with this exchange rate. She suggested otherwise but I declined her offer as the token of my gratitue. I then went to check the real exchange rate and found that I am losing almost 100 dollars in this deal. If I should be cool not to care about this? But that's a lot of money! I went to her, fully embarrassed and expressed my will to adjust the exchange rate. I felt like a complete idiot! Luckily for me, she didn't mind at all.

Man, this is really a good lesson for me. I guess sometimes I am too eager to express a good will money-wise. Nevertheless, I sometimes find myself being trapped in a very ackward situation by my not-at-the-right-time-and-right-place generosity. Perhaps I should just smile and geniunly say "thank you very much". And find some other opportunity to repay the favor. I am just too impatient.

With USD cash in hand, I was so shocked to realise that I can only deposit and wire 5,000 dollars maximum a day.

Clipping Nails in Public

This is one of the most untoleratable thing for me. I cannot figure out why people can clip their nails in the train, in the office, in the book store or in a coffee shop. One clip after another, each crispy sound cuts through the air almost creating a paper-cut like sensation on my skin. I cannot explain exactly why it is so getting on my nerve. Clipping nails is supposed to be very private thing to do?

What do Girls Talk About?

Girls talk about boy friends at their early twenties. The girl gang I hang out with now talk about wedding bangquets, marriage life and then, inevitably, babies. The shocking piece of information Grace told me is that we will be talking about extra-marital affair (wether it is his or hers) in about 5 years time.

Washing Up After Number 2?

Poor Nir lost his racksack in a half-baked taxi ride (he was driven off the cab because the taxi driver wouldn't understand where he wanted to go and he forgot to take his racksack with him, ha ha). This is the second week of Nir's miserable stay in Beijing.
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When I was little, we had guests from Malaysia, Indonisia or Thai. Those were my father's relatives and for some reasons they all came to stay with us when visiting Taipei. Of course, they were all telling us how the natives in those far away countries clean themselves with the right hands and eat with the left hands.

I finally came to understand this is one of the muslim's behaviors. In Kuala Lumur, every toilet stall, regardless it is the squatter or wester style toilet) is equiped with a seperate host, well, I guess, people use it to clean the rearends. The floor is constantly wet, and cleaning ladies linger in the bathroom to mop dry the floor.

In Kuala Lumpur, you can see the amazing concoction of people with different ethinical origin and religions. Malays, Chinese and Indians all speak each other's language, eat each other's traditional foods and work side by side.

Acceptance

I am preparing for a job assignment in Kuala Lumper next week, and just started to read loads of documents compiled by other consultants.

As reading a 26-page doc, I gradually lost patience to comprehand the passage toward the end. I am not panicking at all, which I might get angry with myself few years ago. I am taking it easy because I understand I have to read it again later on. What's the big deal I couldn't get through it the first time? It might not seen efficient but that works very well for me.

Exploring the Difference

I spoil myself a massage treat every weekend. I always ask for girls and, interestingly, I manage to get a new massues every time. Could it be because the turn over is high or it simply because they have a mass number of massues waiting for work?

Anyhow, although they are all very well trained (not only they can all accurately massage the "chi" point in your body but also their techniques are almost identical), you can still feel the subtle difference. It is almost exciting to explore different massage styles. I must be mad.

GuanXi 201

I was reading another book, describing China as a big secret society. During the small agriculture society, there is limit room for GuanXi to develop because people are quite self sustainable. However, when the economic has grown to certain scale, supply/demand driving market is not yet mature and the government has not yet developed an efficient way to liquidify goods/labor, GuanXi is almost the only way to survival.

The book has taken the GuanXi analysis into a second level. We all know that connection is a big part of success, success in making business, getting good jobs, receiving a proper medical attention or sending your kids to the right schools. I think this is true every part of this planet. Chinese world has used it to an extreme, is that all?

The secret social analogy the author has proposed is quite illuminating. In a secret society, honesty and honor are the pillars to build a name. With a name, you can borrow trust, friends, women and wealth without any tangible collaterals. But you put your name on the line. However, chances are you don't need to return those. Being driven by the desire to become somebody, people start to boast, bluff, vainity follows (quite well explain Modern China).

The way GuanXi is built up is quite like an art. It is constructed on top of favor debts. The timing to return the favor and the amount to return are both very critical. The various concoction send different messages to the creditor. For example, if you return it immediately with the equal value, that means you do not want to build up a GuanXi with the creditor. Normally you don't return the favor in equal value, which indicates you and the creditor is merely doing a deal (absolutely not acceptable by Chinese). Taking some time to return the debt tells the creditor that you truely accept his help and geniunly grateful. This might not seem clear cut if this returning goes around several times. However, that was intended effect. The two persons involved know clearly who owns what and how much. GuanXi is then nurished and grown.

Clean Aired Beijing

We had the unexceptional good weather in Beijing this past weekend. The sky is so clear that I can see some mountains miles away from my bedroom windows. The temperature is just about right, even a bit chilly at early morning and evening. I couldn't resist the temptation to go out cycling on the big streets at night. Chang'an road lies between the Forbidden city and Tianmen squre is really huge, riding really fast pass Forbidden city is really fun.

On my way back, I rode past the Beijing Friendship store, which was the only store open to foriegners before 80's. I recalled a story about the saleswoman who was so irritated by a customer who merely asked her a question. They quarelled and the saleswoman was so angry (I don't know why) that she hit the customer on the head with the ice cream bucket. The customer ran and she started chasing him because she wanted to hit him on the back as well.

Don't ask me why those women who work for the state-owned business are so obnoxious to customers. They never laugh and seem to hate everyone. Of course I have met some friendly and nice saleswomen. But very few.

Mirror and Inspiration?

My four new friends. They are really cool in cleaning the strangely stubborn stains in the kitchen and bathroom. I am really wondering how people in the past survive without those chemicals?

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The Beijing project has come to an end and I bid the 8 to 10 working hour fairwell this week. I went home around 7 and didn't know what to do really. Really fancy a drink or 2, talking nonsense but find no local drinking partners.

I was really thrilled to go to a pub with a colleague, who just came to Beijing the first time for this project. We went to the pub I have been to several times, a terrace on top of a 5 story building. Not until we reached the top then I realised I managed to walk into the wrong entrance (they look identical, I swear). The pub was nice anyway (plus no one wanted to walk the 5 flights of stairs again) so we stayed.

I didn't realise anything wrong but, after a while, my colleague pointed out that there are quite a few male couples sitting very closely, chatting in very low voice. Then I noticed the bartenders are very femanine looking and extraordinarily nice. I mean, I am OK with it but the mosquitos were really annoying.

As I was talking to my colleague, I mean, I come to realise why some of my ex-colleagues didn't hang out much with people from the office. I was holding back and thought to myself, wow, I was really outspoken in the past. So, being mature means that you know the way to have a pleasant conversation and have fun without giving away too much of yourself?

The Ape in the Corner Office

Ok, Claire didn't give "Blink" a lot of credit, but I still think it is very fascinating. Indeed, "Blink" is talking about a lot of common sense, however, it is very helpful to some slow-nerved people like me. I guess it is due to my choice of career, I didn't get to deal with people on daily basis. Also, there has not been too much office politics falling upon me (good or bad?), I consider myself very slow in face reading. I am now staring at people's face more. However, interestingly that you can sometimes feel easy when talking and looking into the conversation partner's eyes yet sometimes uneasy.

In my retrospect, I don't think it has anything to do with power or ranking, it has more to do with personality clicking. I guess I unconsciously decide the tone, the voice and the mood of the conversation 2 seconds I meet with a person. Of course, if I feel the partner is ready to accept me, the whole process is going to be more fun. Eye contact is so crucial in expressing the green light. Once the trusty bonding builds up, ideas and coversations flows both ways.

But I did mis-interpret quite a few people before. I think that is because I didn't know myself well enough and, consequently, I didn't know the impact I have on people. Well we should feel grateful that this situation is only going to get better as experience accumulated, perhaps that's the only upside of getting old.

Another very interesting book by Richard Conniff, "The Ape in the Corner Office". The way we behave is really not too far away from Chimps...

Old Chinese saying goes "Even dogs dislike the 2 years old".

XiaoHo's first experience on Train. My mom and XiaoHo accompanied me to Hualian to visit Claire, who was transfered to the small town from Taipei a year ago.
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The journey itself was very fun. In Taipei train station, I was carrying the trolly, a bag for XiaoHo's food and cloth, my own backpack. Just imagine how you can carrythe folded buggie, try hard not to let the wheels stain your light colour trousers, carry 2 bags, keep an eye on the kid (and my mom who is holding him) and go up/down the stairway. My mom managed to find me some food to take on the train, otherwise I would be eating all XiaoHo's crackers and complain non stop.

It is impossible to read at all. I was reading an very interesting book about Finland. But XiaoHo interrupted my supposingly quiet, intellectual reading every 2 minutes. Getting all my mom's attention is not enough for him, he also wanted mine (How Greedy)! The situation got better after I threatened that I am going to send him over to the train manager.

I have to say something about our train manager, with whom after you meet, you would think there is still some hope in this country. He was a middle age man with bright teeth, thin and meticulous dressed. He bowed to the air when entering and spoke with gentle voice to ask for checking our tickets. He had the perfect manner and authority as a train manager. As I spoke to him, XiaoHo held my mom tight and hid his face in between her neck and shoulder. COWARD!

I am not saying Chinese way of running a state owned business or working for such business is not good, it is sometimes more interesting (Yeah, the Firefighter's wife said that she once met a train manager who was so relax that he slept on the train and share the lunch box with her group). However, it was really a great delight to see someone respects his profession, his passengers and himself so truely.

Hair Disaster Again

The moment I set foot into my home in Taipei, my mom was scrutinising my hair... And then Grace came up immediately with her hair cutting kit. I was brave enough to give my consent to let her cut my hair. The day after, I realised the back of my hair was not even and that really bothers me. So my mom did it again with the thining scissors and started trimming the back. I really started to worry when she commented "wow, the scissors are amazing, no matter how randomly I cut the hair, nothing truns too disastrous".

I ran to the hair dressor on Monday. She looked at my hair and said diplomatically "well, maybe you should not try to solve a problem all by yourself".

This is the fifth hair style over these 2 months.
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During my vacation, I decided to make the effort to re-connect with my friends. I called everyone on my phone list and see if we can arrange a time to meet up. Almost all of them made the effort to come out and play.

It is a very good feeling to know that we care about each other. Christine is 7 month pregnant. The once slim, anorexia type of girl ate like mania. Truely it was very entertaining to watch her eating. And JiaYi borke up her engagement because of the argument of dishes on their wedding banquet (we met up few days later, and she had this potential bf with her). YiLan's father's business was in danger because the father's partner tried to keep all the profit by nasty means. Irene's home building project is just started and her Japanese fiancee is coming over to Taiwan to propose to her family in the traditional way. Peggy is still the same, but getting used to the marriage life.

The other gang was the firefighter's wife and Jean and Echo. We hanged out at the pub they frequent and then roamed around the night market after few drinks. We went to the stall introduced by Jean. And we tried on T-shirts and stuff on the street (yeah, you have to ask your friend to hold down your shirt while pulling up new shirt you put on top of your own shirt. Speaking out of embarrassing personal experience... ). We bargained very hard with the owner, who was so funny to talk with (although he didn't give us a large enough discount). We then went to an shaved ice stall to split our closeth. Very fun night!

Grace and Kevin are the most close family friends. They are still good old Grace and Kevin. We almost eat together every meal (Of course, they are addict to my mom's cooking). XiaoHo is getting more mature and talks even more. However, he is constantly negotiating, never 100% rejecting your command. Although he wants something badly, he would say "If I can get this?" patiently or he would say "that doesn't sound too good".

Mankit's new home is great. He will be moving in in a couple of months. It is still under renovation. Carol's and my families met the first time for dinner in a Thai restaurant. And Dad was late again because he had to walk the dog.

Chinese Way

This is the good day when looking out of my flat

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I have got a collection of books discussing how Chinese develop, maintain, and survive in the "system". Chinese society is propelled by this system for thousands of years. Let me elaborate a bit on the "system". Well, GuanXi is a big part of it (for those who are not familiar with the phrase GuanXi, please google it, I think there is a book about Microsoft's experience in China named after this). GuanXi can be roughly translated into "connection". However, I think there is no other place in the world where connection is developed into such an extreme.

The backbond of Chinese society is not made of legal documents or religions or governing power. It is the unspeakable and unconsciously doing of Chinese way.

How was this system created? Some argue this is because of Confuscious' teaching, telling individualism has never been promoted, corporating is the key to survival. Another claim that there is no well-defined social order, laws can be bent anyway to theemperor's liking. Weak and powerless people had no other choice but to form many small circle, so to get the right information, so to get the proper support whenever it is needed.

In the west, heterosexual love plays important part of legends, folklords, poetry and music. However, in their Chinese counterparts, friendships are praised. Guess in Chinese minds, friendship can sustain living but love could do very little.

When those who know how to get to the top by making good connection, this individual might not need to have real talent. And the general public sickly consider this is the way of life. Perhaps this is why renaissance and industrial revolution didn't happen in China? Because we were all too busy to make the right connection?

Uniform Fitting

I should have add one more item to the strange things in Beijing list. The guards and policemens and soldiers in Beijing don't seem to care too much about having a well-fitted uniforms. The shirts and trousers are mostly too big. They have to use a belt to strapped to keep the trousers from falling and the excess being folded in the back. It makes them look like a kid in daddy's outfits.

Best Treat in Summer

My best friend when I was 6 had owned an electronic ice shaver. That was the best thing I had ever saw. The snow white ice came out of the shaver, piling up in a plate. I can imagine many nice cut-up fruits on them, with little syrup. But I have never owned one because my mom wouldn't allow such useless thing in her kitchen.

In fact, we grew up without soft drinks or snacks. We could only have the adult foods, meaning, rice and dishes. We had money for breakfast to buy some bread or milk. My mom cooked for the factory workers and company employees during lunch time while we had our lunch box in school. At dinner, we consumed the leftover from lunch and my mom filled up our lunch boxes with the leftover of leftover.

Our lunch boxes were made of steel. Rice in the bottom compartment and meat and veggies (from different dishes) were all mixed up in the upper one. The whole class's lunch boxes (50 something) were put into a big steel box and we took turn to take it to the steam room. They were steamed until lunch time, so the veggies were never green and everyone's food smelled indistinguishable.

Getting off the train

We went for another difficult hike yesterday. With 30 something celcius temperature, 90% humidity and hazy smoggy air.... The first few hundred steps were really tough. The air was so thick that I felt I had problem to breath properly. The sun was beating down on us, we all sweated much that the perspiration running down like small streams on our backs, necks and arms. The heat was most unbearable. My whole body felt heat coming out from inside and I was really worried if the heating sensation doesn't go away soon, I might be about to explode any second. We took a break every 500 steps, not until we reach the 1500 steps mile stone did the alarming situation was remedied.

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I alwasy tried to avoid contact with strangers in subway, never tried to get on a very crowded cart and so on. However, it seems unavoidable not to touch anyone when getting off the train. People tend to rush in and not letting the passengers off the train first.

I understand that's because people in the waiting area are pushed by those standing behind them. Of course, getting on the train first means a better chance of getting a seat. However, I still couldn't bear those who won't let me off the train first and almost want to hit them. Oh well, I never actually hit anyone but I hold my laptop bag in in front of me, and the elbow protruded outward. I guess I "accidentally" hit a guy really hard with my elbow in his chest this morning when defending my way out of the train. I think his face twisted a bit and I walked away the scene as fast as I can.....

Myth of Slogan

In Chinese world, you can see many many slogans in every day life. In Subway station, there are words telling you how well the station staff are politically educated, for example, "Designed and Operated for the People, Efficient and Advanced". Or "No Spitting in the Subway". On the street, you can see "Enforcing Laws without Tolerance" or "Building the Civilised Society". Interesting as if people behave better if they are reminded of what they are supposed to do (or what the government think they should do). We Chinese do believe in the power of words in any banner.

I have heard that there is a slogan saying "It is illegal to rob a police car".

Life of A Consultant

The Crystal Report Master, Alvaro, once commented that consultant doesn't have life when traveling so he/she could work abnormal hours to kill time.

This is definitely not true for our system engineer. One night, he was so bored that he called his driver (who takes care of his transportation in Beijing) to have dinner with him. Gee, that's really a creative thinking.

Hair Disaster

I had my punk rock chick style hair do two weeks ago. Every one thinks it is very nice but myself. I hate the spiky drag lock sticking out from my head in every direction. Cute? Maybe, but it is really not my style.

I hate it very every bit of my heart so I decided to fix it up on Saturday. I thought this is the simplest operation a hair dresser can do (plus I don't want to embarrass my hairdresser), so I walked into a no-name beauty salon and asked them to straighten it. It all went alright except the result was a complete disaster.

My hair was so soft and straight that it lacks the flexibility so they all limping on my head (not the best shape, either). I looked like I am wearing a hat. I spent a whole day worrying about it, thinking what I can do. Pretty much nothing. I was anxious, worried, cannot think of eating. It is amazing how a simple hair cut can affect your emotion.

I went back to the same beauty salon where I got my drag-lock done. Well, it is really embarrassing. I think my hairdresser must try very hard to refrain himself from laughing and try very hard to look sympathetic. Well, at least we can finally get the problem fixed.

Most Prestige Place

On Friday evening, Wei called me up to see if I am to join them to a night clue. Not quite a clubing person I am but I feel obliged to go. It is kinda shameful to be found out being alone at Friday night. Wei's friend from Taiwan works in this newly open club as a DJ and we are planning to throw him a vist.

My colleagues wore this subtle smile while they overheard where I am going. To my dismay, the very same location has the most famous KTV loundge in Beijing. It is famous because the loundge provides girls with the highest qualities, it is also the most expensive. It turns out the night club we are going is right next to the KTV loundge. The place is filled with middle-age, puff-belly business men. Interesting, they must come from the next door to have some fresh air.

We were sitting at the bar, chatting. And there are some very handsome women walking about, talking to men, and the number of people lingering around the bar decreasing. Those girls are of very good quailities, no kidding. I was told later that the KTV loundge got so famous that they no longer need to supply pretty, English-fluent, colleage graduates anymore.

Guess it is very common for business man to have fun that way in China. No matter you are with a group or staying in a hotel alone, you can always find something. Or it is everywhere and I have not be exposed to that side of the world? That is how brotherhood are built in between business makers? By going to the entertainment places and flirt with girls? Perhaps, I cannot imagine those talking about Peak Oil or C++ programming.

Stockings

This is another very interesting scene in Beijing. Women are sometimes wearing skin-tone, ankle-length stockings with sandals, heels, running shoes, slippers.

How strange the nylon is not comfortable, in a way, I think the cotton socks are more supiror in obsorbing sweat and provide traction. Ah-Ha! It must be of asthetic reason. However, it is so easy to see the supposingly invisible stocking because of the bends.

That is very puzzling.

Hiking With HongXia's Family

HongXia, her husband and RuanShuan. We went for a hike in Xiang Mountain on Saturday.... It is almost 600 meter high and 2,300 steps to the top. The humidity was high but it was quite enjoyable.

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It is very interesting to see toddlers in China wearing a sort of pants, which are wide open at the bottom. Kids can easily squat and do their business without the hassle to pull down anything. You can see a mother holding baby, with it facing her chests, whose rear ends are exposed to the general public though this type of pants.

Sometimes you can also catch a glimsp of 2 or 3 year old weeing at side of the road. I actaully feel quite embarrassed and withdraw from it immediately.

I have nothing against this but I just thought, perhaps it is a good thing to grow the sense of privacy and diginity by a habit of peeing in a covered space at young age. Well, who am I to make this conclusion? Being private is more civilised?

However, just to be fair, we can see the open-air urinals in London as well. Alcohol inflated bladders are definitely heavier than privacy.

Walking Marriage

In the Yuan-Nan province, south west of China, close to the boarder of Cambodia and Thai, there is a monority group, in which the mothers are in charge of the duty of growing and maintaining the family lines.

A mother is the head of a household, the family members are of childrens and elders. Men are only a tools of reproduction. A woman can have many husbands, however, the wife-husband bonding is lose. A man sneaks in to the woman's house at night and leaves by dawn. Childrens were born without accurate knowlege of their biological fathers.

It is said that this minority group has no writing script and it is hard to figure out why is this custome. But possibly the whole village are somhow related by blood, a way of building connection with each other so they can survive as a whole?

I am more curious about the iron-will women. How do they deal with jealousy and anger, all that kind of emotion when seeing her man sleeping around? By taking the revenge of making many lovers stay overnight in her house? What if there is a woman who is very popular and one is not? Do they treat each other fairly?

Sore Throat

I hesitate to write about this topic for quite a while. What is the difference between Beijing inhabitants' breathing systems amongst other cities? In Beijing, you can hear the clearing thoat sound everywhere. I think it is most ubiquteous when walking on the street. But occasionally, you can hear it in workplaces (remember the toilet door is always wide open?) or in the restaurants.

It is the rumbling sound from deep throat, slowly coming up to the behind of the month. And inevitably, a spitting follows. It is so interesting that people make almost identical sounds regardless the age and gender. A very well-dressed woman walking in front of you could turn her beautifully make-up head and spit right before your toes.

I am only afraid of being hit by the spitting bomb.

Eye shadow

I have my hair cut very short, I am not very used to it because the haircut makes me look too modern. This morning I decided to apply some dark brown eye shadow to go with my new hair style and then some people think I had a lousy sleep last night because my eyes look swallon...

I hurried to the lady's to take it off.

American Born Chinese

Very cute salt and pepper containers
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They are very interesting species. If you remember the 4 girls from Joy Luck Club, despite their different mothers, they all think, behave, or even look similar. I can identify ABCs among real Chinese quite easily. Most have very healthy appearance, nice skin, shining white teeth. They speak fluent English and strange-tone Mandarin. They think like westerners, although brought up in Traditional Chinese families. The young ABCs are bright, never shy away from any possiblity of having fun. Very confident, I guess it is because the western education system praises the individualism highly. It is so unthinkable for them to place a single thread of doubt in their values as an individual (But I do that all the time... ).

The old ABCs are more modest, I guess it is the aging process makes them wonder what they actually are. Generally, they are mild, earnest, well-eduated with not-so-distinguishable personalities, just like average American. But somehow you have no desire to know more about him/her due to the fear of finding out the fact they are all the same?

Beijing is like a big play ground for them. Most work for multinational company, as the bridge between the US headquater and the virgin market in China. Foriegn companies need them, they are more reliable and controllable comparing to the locals. US salary makes them the elite group, they all hire maids to clean their flats. The circle of expats is so small that you see the same faces (differnt girls though) over and over again in different clubs, where no real conversation is carried out and the mixture of green tea/whisky is served. I wonder how they keep their sanity with the same activity on weekly basis.

I guess I can be friend with them if I can tell who is who?

Thin-Slicing

I am reading Malcolm Gladwell's "blink thinking". We were trained to think that a good decision must be associated with accurate observation and prudent thinking. However, we are making judgements based on our instincts from time to time. Life simply doesn't allow you the time to gather information and digest them. However, our reaction patterns are heavily shaped by our experience, language and surroundings.

One very interesting point he brought up is that we are all very bad story teller. We cannot clearly describe what we want until we see it. Trying to explain our decision almost always twists the true reasoning. Putting it into words handicap our decision making process.

Claire's Brother

I was dragged out by Clement on Friday night. He is really a character. He just came back from a week long meeting in Bankok, spent few hours in Taipei and then boarded on the plane to Beijing and endured a full-day meeting and then still want to go out and play.

We went to the pub where lots of expats frequent. The terrace on top of a building, nice breeze in the mid summer night. Clement enjoys life enormously. He is easy-going, chatty and energetic. We hung out until 3am, almost went to another pub with some French to watch football.

I asked him what is so good about life, we are doing the same old things again and again for thousands of years. He replied "that's why we have to do it better".

Divoced is Desired

It is rather enlightening talking to my colleague in Beijing Office. He claimed, the divoced man or woman in their 30s are in most demand. If you are single to this age, people start to imagine all kind of reasons why you are still single. You must be a super play girl not to be married this late.

Thus, it is of most beneficial to claim that you have had a marriage before. And your partner treated you most unfairly, you suffered for very long time, still try to find a way to get out of the painful experience.

Obviously, I am not very marketable in China.

Reading is so Fun

Because of English footballer's freckles, I started to miss London very much. I bought the 20 hour long BBC documentary of religion and Agatha Christie's "Murder is Easy". I lay the book in the project room and my client looked at the title, asking me in a worried voice "That is not a non-fiction book, right?"

I accidentally bought another copy of a book I possessed but have not read. Gee, I am really getting old. That is a novel whose background is set at Beijing under Japanese's control before world war II. The cruelty and violence bit are often heard, but I am really interested in the description of real Beijing life.

Beijing natives are very proud to be useless. The ethinic group, Chi, were from east north of China. They came into the central land, drving away the Ming Dynasty and started Chin Dynasty. Those Chi people were absolutely minority but shared the glory of becoming the govening class in central land. As they induldged themselves in foods, drink, having fun, they lost their fighting skills. No longer knows how to ride a horse. However, they are all masters of the art of good living.

Working hard is viewed as very low class thing to do, that's for the servants. They breed birds in spring time, train eagles in summer, bet on little cricket fight in fall and go to the famous brothel in winter. They worship uselessness.

Take breeding bird for example, it is definitely not an easy work to do. First of all, you have to get the right bird, get the most delicately carved cage and work out different bird foods in different seasons. You then have to wake up at 5am to "walk" the bird. Walking with the bird in a cage but you have to swing the cage so the bird's muscle can be trained while holding tight to to the stick. The next thing is to find a good environment for the bird to learn how to sing. You have to get the bird in the middle of other birds for quite a while so it feels intimidated first and wants to do better later. It is very very important to get the bird into the right crowd, otherwise, it would learn the type of singing it is not supposed to do.

Serious Air Pollution Alert

My mom bought me the finding-demo mask to fight the bad air quality in Beijing. Too embarrassing to wear it....
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I walked out of the building and thought I was in foggy London, it turned out that is the serious air pollution. The uncunning combination of temperature and humidity has created this disaster.

Smart Kids

Finally met with HuaRu in Beijing. We have not seen each other after graduating from high school in Taiwan, it has been almost 13 years. It is so interesting that we both think that each other looks exactly the same as in high school.

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My mom and I talked about how XiaoHo has exhibited intellengence above his peer group. He's never asked for help when playing with kids older than him and always makes other kids cry for help. My mom started to worry that he might have a tougher road in life.

Being normal and complying with others' expectation is a way to survival?

Toilet Seat Up

When I was growing up the household was run by my bad-temper father. The dinner table was sometimes a frightful place to go. He had this funny mood swings, sufficient to bring everyone's appetitle down when bad enough. He showed his stress openly, and demanded our attention. We had to feel bad about ourselves for not contributing to the finance and burdening him.

At the end of day, he walked freely in his undergarments around the house and ignored the fact that I was very uncomfortable. He never closed the door when using the toilet (only when there were guests). And the toilet seat is alway up for male family member's convinence.

Things are very different now. My mom insisted to get the automatic cleaning toilet seat. Girly lotions and hair dryer were moved from our rooms to the bathroom rack. The glassy divider was not installed so she can bath XiaoHo easily. No one can walk around the room without fully dressed except XiaoHo. I cannot help but feel a great relief.

I think my father's confidence has suffered a serious blow. He cannot control us financially and he sees no other means to re-gain his power. He wilts day after day.

Be nice to your family members.

Stress About What

I was slightly drunk and decided to cut my hair, not quite sure how it turns out so the picture.
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I had a horrible dream that my colleagues all turned against me because they don't like the way I work. I was isolated and my wallet was stolen again. No one gave me any helping hand. I was lost in a big department store and Irene (funny why she was involved in our project?) wouldn't tell me where she is exactly over the phone.

Be nice to your colleagues.

I Miss London

I was sitting in a pub watching the English and Pauraguay game. Reading the last name of English players' last name, for example, Hargreaver; seeing the freckles on the footballers' face, all those remind me so much of UK.

Madera and Chinese Rice Wine

When I first tasted Madera in Golden's Wine Bar near Embankment station, I thought it is really much like the Chinese Rice Wine I had while I was small.

I bought a bottle of Chinese Rice Wine tonight and I thought, Gee, this is so much like Madera. The sweetness level is low, its dry and very smooth.

What do Chinese and Spainish/Porteguese have in common taste of alcohol?

Strange Things I Notice So Far

World Cup opening, I am staying home watching TV and updating my blog. This is my coffee table but I work, eat, read on it.

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1. Every Chinese phrase in public area has English translation, not the English that English native could understand but the HanYu spelling. For example, 洗手間 would become Xi Shou Jian, which means washroom. I really don't understand what those English letters are for.

2. Strange decoration in hotels and office buildings' lobby area. For example, in my client's office building, there is a fountain with a huge marble ball rolling in the middle. The ball is so huge (radius is almost 2 feet) and I still couldn't figure out how they keep the ball rolling on top of a small crust with the tiny amount of water coming out of the crust. Anyhow, I think it is really an eye sore. Less is more is definitely not true in Beijing.

3. News stand plays a high-pitch, not pleasant woman voice, hurriedly and repeatedly saying "Xinhua Newspaper, XXX Newspaper, YYY Newspaper...". Is it necessary to tell the passbys what newspapers you have? If it is, would it be nice to use some pleasant voice and make she speak it slowly?

4. A talking bus. Of course, the bus itself doesn't talk. There are always 1 or 2 managers go with a bus, they collect tickets and talk. They don't only talk to the passengers but use the loud speaker talking to the pedestrains or drivers around the bus "Be careful, be careful, the bus is approaching the stop. Watch out, watch out, the bus is leaving the station". Their voices sound exhausted, tired and I-do-it-only-because-I-have-to.

5. The door of Lady's room is alwasy wide open (oh, there is door to each stall, thank god). It is quite embarrassing for me to use the toilet while the corridor is so quiet and I think every one in the office across the hall can hear the sound I make. That doesn't seem to bother other girls.

6. I have met girls in the lady's at work place, bringing with them some newspaper or files or magazine. I thought doing number 2 is something really private and personal. You don't want to do it in the public toilet, not even to broadcast it by bringing with you a magazine to the toilet.

To Be Continued.... (as I discover more)

Unexpeccted Death

Upon returning home after a week in the camp (a meeting with client, not fun, believe me), three of my friends are dying. They are now moved to the intensive care unit where plenty of water is supplied, the comfined environment can effectively lock the moisted air. I can hope maricle would happen and I only need to give up taking shower for a while.
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I was hanging out with a expat group, we talked about how hard it is to bargain in Silk market. The expat group all look Chinese but very "white" inside. But they do learn how to play the game very well.

Some told me to go there very early in the morning, the stall keepers are eager to close the first deal. Or around the closing time, the stall keepers are tired and want to make a sale quick. The other guy told me his experience. He walked into one stall and found a suitcase he really likes. As usual, you have to feedback the 30% of the asking price. The stall keeper snorted. He walked out and pretended to look around in the neighbouring stalls, hoping the stall keeper would come out and agree on the price he offer. Nothing. He then spent another few hours searching for that particular suitcase to no avail. The stall keeper smiled brightly when he returned.

Amazingly, westerners in Silk market are very good bargainers. They can shamelessly counter offer 1 RMB to some item whose asking price is 500 RMB. I guess they truely believe everything is amazingly cheap in China.

The bargaining process is emotiona-filled. I have seen the sellers got so angry that she threw the pair of shoes on the floor. As a shopper, you sometimes feel guilty not to buy it or offer the price too low. I am not very good in this game, never bought anything apart from foods.

Ding-Ling, Ding-Ling

Riding around town in Beijing is quite easy and stress-free comparing to the public transportation. Well, theoretically speaking, taking taxi should be nice and easy until one Friday, I had 2 unpleasant taxi ride experiences. One taxi driver forgot to bring enough changes, we had to break a hundred yuan bill while I was really in a hurry to the client site. The other taxi driver didn't get my instruction correctly, I had to argue with him to make him stop the meter.

I have been very nice and quiet initially when riding my bicycle. But I find it very dangerous while going through crowded streets. Because pedestrains don't really pay attention to their surroundings. I started to use the bell, I thought it is rude at first but no one seems to mind.

Ring the bell gives you the strange sense of power as if the blocking-your-way pedestrains would be blown away with the Ding-Ling Ding-Ling sound.

Food and Sarcasm

I have been spending evening eating out with my friends visiting from Taiwan. And I found that I have lost the ability to think of interesting events to decorate my blog. My conclusion is that it is very bad for you to feast on good foods too much for too long and I can finally understand why English people have such great sense of sarcasm.

Chinese Men's Penis Phobia

No matter what you sell, you can almost guarantee the market share if the marketing bluff includes phrases like "make you energetic in bed" or "never fall" in Chinese world. Many of the strange, cruel way of dining or food ingredients come from the idea that it can make you a sexual superman.

There is a dish, named "3 squeaky voices", which is to eat the new-born mice alive. The 3 small squeaks come from the weak voice of a mouse when you pick it with your chopsticks, when you dip it in some sauce and when shovel it in your mouth. I only heard about it when I was small over the dinner table. But I can tell from my father's friends' faces, this is one of those type of dishes.

It is so funny that, in Chinese world, a man can be a total loser in every aspect of life but he cannot fail in bed as to satisfy his woman (thus, to control her, ha ha ha ha ha). Perhaps we should sell software telling our clients that you are not going to fall ever if using this product.

Forbidden City Kitchen Cookings

Master Li in Beijing is the decendant of the head of Forbidden city security guards, who has hold hold of the imperial recipe. Master Li started a restaurant to replicate the dishes meant for the emprorer. Li's daughter quit her job as a doctor became a full-time chef.

The food? You can tell that they use the best quality of ingredients and less MSG. The chef is very serious about the food. We have 12 cold dishes and 8 hot dishes. They all come in small portions, however, not as surpring as Royal China in London. Maybe I am bias, I like Cantonese crusin and there is not too much suprise in the imperial recipe.

Another very Nice Beijing Duck Place

The weather in Beijing is getting warmer and you see more green on the streets. Lots of people take out their small chairs, sitting on the road side and chatting with neighbours, enjoying the nice breeze. The summer is in town.

It did take us a while to find this restaurant, it is hidden in a small, old, close-to-demolish Hutong (don't ask me why is small alley ways in Beijing is called Hutong, not even local knows. The combination of the two characters, Hu and Tong, doesn't mean anything in Mandarine). You cannot tell that you are in the one of the top duck restaurants in Beijing when you entered the restaurant, you think you might have set foot into a local Beijing person's house.

But anyhow, they grill the duck in the open heath, burning the special type of woods. It is said there are 16 traditional procedures to make the duck, none of them is missing. The duck skin is crispy and light. The fat is tender but not stringy, not smelly. The meat is very soft. I think the duck is very young, might be 2 month old only.

It is unimaginable to eat those so-call Peking Duck (threaded deep-fried duck meat, probably those Cantonese Roast duck leftover) in London or New York China town again.

Tax Code

It is common practice in Taiwan to have two accounting books for small business. My mom kept one book for tax purpose and another one for real in/out cashflows. Quite a few Taiwanese who have business in China have done the same. However, the taxation and law systems are very different.

In China, the tax auditing force is so large that they can carry out throughout investigation to almost all business. Cooking the book or producing fake invoice is criminal offense (affecting national economic growth). Offenders cannot simply get out by paying fines. They are arrested and imprisoned, or even death penalty depending on how much tax you own.

The staticstic shows there are at least 90,000 Taiwanese being detaining in Chinese prisons.

Da Vinci Code, the mood of flower

Went to see Da Vinci Code with Cherry and Ben. To me, the movie is like wathcing Indiana Jones in Discovery Channel. Although knowing the Christinality history in Europe, but I have never learnt the secret society, piory of sion. I only remember people in medieval time killed each other, not because they were hungry, which really puzzles me.

Is Jesus Chris the divine or human, doesn't seem really important to a atheist like me. But I can feel the impact this has caused in western world somehow. But during the movie, the scenes of Monty Python's holy grail kept coming up in my mind. It is kinda funny.

I also watch Wong Kai Wei's the mood of flower. Very pretty. Maggie Cheung is drop-dead beautiful. But there is nothing besides prettiness in the movie. I don't know much about the artisitc aspect of the film making but I can feel that he is showing off.

How to Learn a Foreign Language

It is so funny to learn that XiaoHo has learnt Cantonese. Between my parents, they speak in Cantonese. But they always switch channel to Madarine when talking to XiaoHo. Somehow XiaoHo interrupted them when they were engaged in a Cantonese conversation. He understands the language!

Do you remember how you pick up the language when you were a kid? How do you make the connection of objects and their names? How did you learn how to describe and express your emotion? How do we learn communicating with others?

Does it Matter?

More than one person told me about how change is calculated in some common stores in south america. The changes has to be counted in a reverse manner to make up the total amount the customer pays. During the counting process, prevent yourself from talking, otherwise the counting has to be started again. They are happy people, no one seem bothered.

In North America, most math teachers carry with them a calculator, which is strictly prohibited in Taiwan. Because we have to write 2 big entrance exams at age 15 and 18, no calcultor is allowed. How to do add, subtract, multiply and so on by heart is a crucial skill to speed up answering math questions. We had to remember the squre of number 1 to 44, the cube of number 1 to 25, the squre root of number 2 to 5, learn those tricks to do (23*34) quickly, for example.

Does this matter to how a country performs or the government functions? I guess it is not too relevant. It is more related to how to allocate capable people in the proper positions, and do it efficiently.

Taiwan President's Son-in-Law

The Taiwan President's son in law has been involved in some insider trading scandal. I have never paid much attention to how the first family members look like but this guy was on TV news almost on daily basis.

The news clips show his work environment and what he does in work. He is a physician. I was really impressed that he looks clean, earnest and very into his patients. I think we all have some unknown, unexplainable feelings toward doctors. This profession almost makes a normal human being become a superman. Any issue that is related to the upmost secrecy of your body seems so trivial to them. You also feel obliged to open up without any hesitation. For example, the doctor could ask casually that how is your sex life and you would blob your guts out although what he wants to do is to prescribe you some birth control pill so he can make money. I guess fewer people feel that way toward lawyers or computer programmers.

A developer came to ask the client, did you do anything unusual to make the application crash? The client would routinely fall into the denial mode and blames the developer for writing this piece of work.

I dreamt about queuing up to see the Taiwan President's Son-in-Law for my eczma problem but I woke up before seeing the doctor.

Misread

I am not a particularly careful reader, my misinterpretation has provided my friends quite a few entertainment.

When I was in California, I think my friend wrote me an email saying that he might get laid off in New York. I was so confused because I didn't read the "off" (it was hidden in the next line). This sentense doesn't make much sense at all! I politely replied that he will succeed if he works hard enough.

I was chatting with a friend over MSN, I think we were talking something about the cute Chinese masseur in Beijing. We then talked about life sucks and nothing is worth smiling anymore. He then said "many smile when massaging me". I was like... What the hell is this? Am I going to become a masseues to smile a lot?!?! After a few minutes of chaotic exchange of words, I finally realised he was saying "many smile when MESSAGING me!"

Rain

The thunder storm came this evening, the rain washed off the dirt in the air, I walked to the subway station breathing the fresh air. I arrived in the station where is bright enough that I found my black trousers were dotted with mud. Who would think the little rain drop has carried so much sand?

Shopping in the Traditional Market

The highlight of my weekend is to go shopping in the traditional market nearby. My challenge is to buy the best quality of fresh fruit, veggies and meat with only a 10 yuan bill. One time I had only 5 yuan and 50 jiao left, and I walked to the butcher, planning to buy some ground meat.

I picked one small piece of pork belly for gridding but the stall owner told me it costs 6 yuan. I told her how much I had left and that's what I am planning to pay. She was almost angry when she cut a small piece of the meat, not even weighting it again. I then got my 5 yuan and 5 jiao worth of ground pork.

Banana Leave

This is a vert weird restaurant. They have got a westerner as a captain, who is managing a group of hyper-active, gender-unidentifiable, sexual-orientation ambiguous philipinos. You cannot enjoy your food quietly because the wait staff would come around and grap you to dance. They sing happily, skillfully ignoring their customers' boring faces.

Interestingly, both women and men love to touch our guys. Ben and Liu Yang felt molested and annoyed.

Fish Chair

I went to this fake anti store in Beijing, it was so exciting. There are so many little things to see, much much more interesting than silk street, that only sells clothes and fake LV hang bags. I bought a small fish-shape chair so I can work on my little coffee table and watch TV at the same time. Beijing seems nicer recently.
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Neitzsche argued that human beings have only will to power. I only wish I could have the power over my plants.

Shallow and Visual

I cycled the whole day and my back was really sore. So I decided to get a mini massage. I asked for the boy massuer because I thought my back really need some heavy dose of massage. But they sent in a very cute guy.

I felt very embarrassed to let a guy rob my feet. I guess my uneasiness is contagious, the automosphere became weired. Maybe I should insist a girl massues in the future.

Mosquito

I finally found my old camera, yay! I went to the local garden center every weekend, I have got 5 plants by now. Taking care of them is a very nice thing to do.

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When I was back home last week, the weather was very warm and we got almost a dozen mosquitos in our flat. Grace, Mankit and I were jumping up and down, waving and flapping the rolled up newspapers. No one can really get those staying up in the ceiling. My mom then told us to use the transparent plastic bag, slowly approaching our target. Inevitably, the target flies down and be trapped inside the bag.

Grace's mom was really impressed. She is a devoted Buddhist and she uses the same method to catch mosqitos but releases them outdoor. But my mom indicated she usually kills them by flattening the bag.