Ken's Wedding

I think I need to buy another dress for attending weddings in the future.
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Ken is my ex’s cousin. For some strange reason, we kept running into each other. We first met in San Francisco. We met up in New York when he visited the big apple. He moved to London couple of years before I do, and Beijing. I swear I was not stalking him but he is really good in keeping touch with old friends. He would throw me a call once in a while.

In order to make my way to his wedding, I begged the project coordinator to put me on the project in Kuala Lumpur, so that I can easily fly to Singapore. Hey, why not? Thang also flew in from London. The banquet was like the Londoner re-union. It was also nice to see my ex’s parents and sister. Very well connected in Singapore and Indonesia, people in this huge family hang out to each other. After the banquet, Londoner friends and the family all went to night club.

Non-stop supplies of Champagne and sake swamp the tables. We then all went to eat the famous Hannan Chicken Rice. The rice is cooked with the juice coming out while cooking chicken, very well done. The chicken itself is also very tender, even the breast meat is juicy.

I had a very good chat with one of the uncles. He seemed to like me a lot, always standing next to me. I didn’t pay attention when he put his hands around my waist. After the food, it was raining really hard. He offered to drop me off in my hotel and accidentally drop his hand on my thigh in the cab. Oh well, I casually cross my leg and his hand fell off, conversation continued. I thanked him for the ride and ran to the hotel lobby.

Special Treatment of Smoke

I think I am getting tanned, no idea how, I spent most of my time at work

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My manager went to TianJin for a presales meeting and checked into a local hotel. The front desk staff asked him if he smokes, he said no. The girl then said "Oh, we then need to do some anti-smoke treatment to your room".

"Anti-smoke treatment?", my manager with great suspicision, thinking it is another trick to put a chargable service on the bill.

"Oh, we need to take away the ashtray".

Difficult Client

Uncle Walton cooked me the curry chicken and the fish belly stew when I was in Hong Kong. Uncle Walton, his wife, my mom and I went to a small tea house at the hill top. We also picked the fresh beans and lettuce in the farm nearby.


My mom reheated the chicken curry and threw in those fresh veggies, our lunch looked so colorful!
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I arrived in the client in KL on Monday only to realize the static data is not completed. To make it worse, the consulant who works on the static data was on vacation and she took the build machine with her.

Being penny counting, the client got very upset that they have to pay for my expense while I cannot do my job. I also felt pretty bad that I knew nothing about the project until I came. However, I was scheduled to come to KL next week. Because there are 2 national holidays in that week, thus, our project manager swapped the time with my Tokyo client. I was panicking telling the client I think I cannot do any work except going through the requirements with front and risk officers in a workshop. However, the project plan has only allocated 1 day for workshop, we cannot kill the rest of the week by extending the workshop. Also, there is only 14.5 days allocated for me in phase I.

The client is very tight in their budget, their project manager kept asking why I am here and I couldn't give him a satisfactory answer. The worse is yet to happen,, we cannot seem to contact our project manager, who has devised this schedule.

Being grilled by their project manager (he kept interrupting our conversation with comments like “didn’t we talk about this with xxx? There is really a problem with your internal communication”, I still have to conduct the workshop with the front, risk officers. I did my best to keep calm and being as honest as I can. I want to find a solution.

At the end of the day, I said to him, suppose you think it is impossible for me to work on your report at my demo database, I need 1 day from you to draft up the specifications. I will then ask our company to absorb my expense on Wednesday, and I will then take Thursday and Friday off. He didn’t seem happy but accept it as an option.

I then went back, trying hard to call our project manager. I finally got to him yet he explained that I would have to work on the demo database and then transfer my work from the demo database to the client’s at end of May. I am skeptical that the client will buy into this. Yet he was determined this is the plan and the client have no other choice but to take it. All parties agreed to have a conference call the next day.

I was so very nervous, got up and then did some work, and ran to the office to give our project manager a call before the conference call. He sounded all confident that his plans will work. However, after we have appeared so not professional, I really see no reason why it is going to succeed.

During the conference call, again the complaints flew off from the client’s project manager. The bank’s treasurer is also in the room. Our project manager attacked the client with 2 points. One, Joey is on site this week because you are being cheap not willing to have her next week. Second, suppose you wouldn’t want Joey this week, we will have no other time for you (indeed, my schedule has been booked until mid June).

I tried to easy the tension, promising that I can go about do the work at the demo database and guaranteeing the reports can be delivered on time. Our company (that’s I) should and will absorb any extra time needed for the migration. In explaining “We really wanted to help you save money, although there are additional work needed to be done, we are willing to do it” Gee… This is the only way we can save us some face?

Party with Noriko

Party Queen Noriko and I, the picture was taken last year after a belly dancing lesson.
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We had a girls night out on Friday. It was Akiko's birthday so we took her to a Champaign place in Ebisu. Honestly, I am not much of a champaign person, I prefer beer to the delicate bubbles(they all taste like fizzy white wine to me). No guy in the office seemed to want to join us, perhaps they are embarrassed to be the only man in the group.

But we later went to a Kyushu restaurant, featuring everything about horse and cow. We had raw horse meat, served like sasimi and beef stomach hotpot (nabe). Going so well with beer. Tomo asked Hiroko what type of dog she has, Hiroko answered "In Katagana, it is 'NaNa'" (the dog's name). For some reason, all Japanese ladies crack up. They should know that is the so typical of Hiroko.

Noriko then dragged me to the night clubing area in Rippongi. She is completely wild everytime she partys. In addition, she is so attractive that I had to drive away many guys away from the half-drunk Noriko. I kept an eye on her while talking to people in a very crowded bar.

People who come to the bar are looking for some sort of fix, I think. We are all suffering from attention-deficit? I had very nice conversation with 2 guys, who are also in Tokyo for business. I don't believe a single word they say, not because they look insincere but this is a pub. Everyone could come and bluff and then disappear. Having fun is top on the list, making friends is not.

There was a white guy dressed in suit, kept following us (or rather Noriko) after I decided it is time to take Noriko away from this group of hungry wolves. His stories are very good, a lawyer interviewing with some famous investment banks, stories about his mom and sister, the recently burglary happened in his New Jesey home... Blah blah blah... It is very entertaining. Noriko cannot careless about his stories, she is just attention hungry, while I kept asking questions and drew more information out of the kid "How did you afford Harvard law school?", "Where do you live in New Jesey?" and so on. Whether it is true or not has nothing to do with me, but it is still quite fun to have a free entertainment while waiting for cabs.

Traumatised by One-Way Ticket

The Tokyo office manager explained me that the travel agent refused to issue me an one-way ticket from Tokyo to Kuala Lumpur because

1. I might be blocked in Narita airport by Japanese immigration officer - It is definitely ridiculous. Japanese immigration officer only wants to make sure that you have the ticket leaving Japan, not the ticket coming back to Japan.

2. The Malaysia immigration might refuse my entry because I can show no proof of leaving the country. - What? You can easily go to Singapore by train, by bus within 3 hours. Says who you need to fly out of Kuala Lumpur to another country? In addition, I have never been questioned how I am going to leave Kuala Lumpur in my half dozen times of visiting. I am granded the 90-day visitor's VISA on landing.

3. The airline might refused me boarding the air plane because there is a chance Malaysia goverment could refuse my entry - It is highly impossible however, I have explained them that I will purchase a ticket to leave the country if that's the case, they still refuse to issue me the ticket.

I spent half an hour explaining to the brain-damaged travel agent with the best of my patience. She could only reply me "this is written in the hand book, I cannot sell you the one-way ticket but you can buy a round trip ticket".

Hand-Carry Luggage

Do you want a piece of me?

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Security check at all international flights are serious about liquids in bottles. After my losing luggage experience, I don’t want to place the responsibility of delivering my luggage to other’s hand. I decided to try my luck with the security staff.

In Auckland airport, before going to the passport control, a lady asked me to weight my roller, which is 10 kg, way beyond the 7 kg limit. However, who cares? Suppose the airline doesn’t pick on me, it is not your call to not allow me board. I was trying to be nice and it was really too early in the morning. I took out the books I bought along the way, all my toiletries. The roller finally weighted around 8 kg and she was OK.

As I was stuffing the books and bottles into my handbag, she said that I am not allowed to carry them to the plane. I ignored her demand, tried to explain it is impossible for me to leave them in Auckland as I have no relatives or home here. We stood silent for seconds, I was trying to figure out a way to get out of this place but my brain wasn’t really functioning at that point of the time. I have no brain power to figure out the dim and mystery world her plankton-size brain inhabits.

She demanded me to put everything on the scale, the third time. I dutifully followed her instruction slowly, but showing no intention to leave anything behind. She got angry and told me stop telling her how to do her job. I knew I was breaching the regulation but I don’t want to let the airline company to have a chance to mess around with my luggage again because I don’t want to miss my connection flight to Beijing.

As people coming in piling up the queue, she had to let me go (because my stuff was still on the scale, she accused me of holding other people). Her fat face and small eyes were filled with the hatred. She cursed “You will be surprised”.

The second challenger is at the security gate. They let go my hand bag and roller, however, pick on my toiletries sealed in plastic bag. The containers might be big, however, the liquid inside was certainly less than 100 ml. The old security officer said that he had to throw away my face wash foam. Fine, I let him. He almost wanted to throw away my contact lens solution, but I quickly recalled that is exempted. So I saved one bottle. As for my lotion, I fetched the small toner sample and pour the liquid to my hand and applied them generously on my face. The officer was so annoyed because he wants to get back to work. I then slowly squeeze the face lotion into the toner bottle. Not leaving a single drop. The officer was like “you might have a day to do that but I have other work to do”. What else can I do? It is your business if you are not happy.

After all these hassles, I finally got the precious right to get closer to the gate. I was a very angry with a burning face. These security measures are only inconveniencing travelers, they didn’t find out the nail files in my cosmetic bag, the sharp tweezers that could easily turn into a weapon and the lighter in my pocket. I think these rigid security regulations would easily turn an ordinary citizen into a terrorist.

Trip to ShangHaiGuan

This section of the great wall was built across a lake.

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My other title is the chief entertainment officer in Beijing office, thus, I was given the job of planning an outing in spring. We finally found the weekend when every one is in Beijing, which is the past weekend.

We took the train to ShangHaiGuan, the direct translation is the Mountain-Sea Passage, which is the eastern starting point of the great wall. The English equivalent should be New Castle suppose mirroring Hadrian’s wall with the great wall.

Along the railway track, we saw lots of soil buns between the farmlands and the track. I was told those are the tombs of the locals. I was so surprised of its simplicity. Each of them looks like the miniature sand dune you can spot near any construction site. If not because it is the season of ancestor tomb visiting season, thus, each of them has some colorful paper stripes under a stone, you can hardly tell it is a tomb. It is also astonishing to observe the number of the soil dune. Oh well, I guess my anthropology study friends should have a lot to write if they were there with me.

Checked into the hotel, we walked around this seaside town. The air quality was definitely better. The great wall divides the small city into half. You can see the section that hasn’t been “renovated”, the 10 meters high walls were built with grey bricks, which were sealed together with sticky rice glue. It is so hard to believe they were like 2000 years old, wow!

I hate the way they renovate historical site, they basically hire the poor farmer and instruct them to chisel away the old bricks so they can put on the brand new bricks, freshly made from the local supplier.

Regardless, there are still a lot to be seen. We hired the car (and the driver) to go to the section of great wall where it crosses a lake. The part of great wall is not very well-known and we had the whole park to ourselves. The mountain area in this part of China has very poor soil composition. Basically nothing can be grown out of it except from the peach and plum trees. The wall winds down the hill top to the lake yet goes up again to another mountain. The hills are pretty steep, it is really beyond my imagination how the wall was constructed 2000 years ago.

Standing on top of the wall on the hill top, looking out to the no-tree mountain far away with sun setting, this very much reminds me of my trip to Hadrian’s wall few years back. However, it certainly doesn’t rain as much as in Northern England.

Auckland Presales

Knowing it is so easy for airline to mess around transferring check-in luggage, plus the 8-hour lag I had to wait in Sydney for the connecting flight to Auckland, I requested to pick up my check-in luggage at Sydney. As luck would have it, my flight from ShangHai to Sydney was delayed by 5 hours. I quickly went to the transfer counter in Sydney requesting them to pick up my luggage from the belt to my Quanta flight to Auckland.

I have got the promise, the delivery of my luggage was depending on the mercy of the efficiency of the Sydney airport crew. After arriving at Auckland after 34 hours of traveling, Quanta managed to lose my luggage. Almost burst into tears, the luggage department assured me that my bag was on the next flight to Auckland. Fine, I then wait for another 2 hours for it to turn up. I kept encouraging myself, things can get worse. 2 hours wait is certainly better than turning up in front of the clients in jeans tomorrow.

Finally arrived in the hotel at 2 am, I need to get up early to meet with the presales team at 7am since I have missed out the internal meeting on the very day.

The presales team seems to work together for a very long while, a strange bundle. I cannot tell that they are really that into their jobs or this is just a typical way of talking among colleagues. At any point of the day, their conversation is 100% about the clients, the software, and their wild speculation of possible clients’ perception about their presentation, or even to themselves personally. The level of their paranoid is like a teenage girl dreaming about her prom date.

They made fun of the clients, prying into their personal lives and laughed out loud about the how young the IT head’s second wife is (I am very impressed with their information gathering effort). While seeing the clients, they wore another face but giggling to themselves occasionally. During the presentation, 3 of them who worked together laughed a great deal while the clients, our sales and I stood completely silent. I really couldn’t understand what’s so funny and felt a bit embarrassed.

The presentation to my standard is not very professional. The presales woman is trying to hide the fact that there are actually 2 separate systems we are trying to sell them. However, when the clients asked why the valuations are done separately, she wasn’t giving a explanation but a spin. Even sweet and innocent I could sense something is fishy.

I can feel the presale woman doesn’t like me. She seems to be the center of this work force (she laughed the most loudly, chunked out ill-tasted jokes one after another). However, I turned up and more or less took away the spot light from her. I am younger and my make-up is lighter. I spoke conservatively and I don’t blindly laugh at the clients’ remark.

She ignored me after my debut in front of the client. She wouldn’t talk to me at all on the dinning table or in the meeting room. She only talked to her long-term comrades. At the end of our presentation, she asked me to build a report to show certain functionality. I did it in the background and indicated it can be shown now. She was urged by another colleague to check out my work. She came around reluctantly and had a quick look and instructed me to demo it to the client.

Half way through the demo, the client pointed out my report is missing a very crucial element. She then quickly joined at the clients’ side, questioning whether it can be done. Interesting, she didn’t think that way before asking me to do the demo.

One of this team seemed very keen to convince me to relocate to their office (because I seemed to be the only one who knows the risk stuff, should be useful to her work). “To work with them on daily basis?” I ask myself “I would rather quit” is the answer.

Before Going to New Zealand

There are days where everything looks just alright and BOOM, something happens which mercilessly ruins your day. Beijing is getting warm and I am leaving for Auckland in the evening.

I cycled to the office. I am getting more and more painstakingly meticulous about managing my finance (almost like how I manage my toilet). I realize that my premium account actually charge me very high service charge if the minimum balance cannot be met.

The first thing I did was to transfer money to my uncle’s account and withdrew everything that’s left. Banking with foreign bank in China is really pointless. The foreign banks cannot issue credit cards, cannot provide the ATM service, either can they help you pay bills. They are also not allowed to sell any RMB investment products. I banked with them really is to experience the premium account service, you know, personal banking assistance and separate waiting room, and of course, money wiring is free of charge.

Getting no really benefit other than the free wiring, plus being charged for a fee. I decided to close it, then went back to the office, went home to pick up my luggage and taxied to the airport. Unfortunately, my phone rang saying that my fund transfer request was wrongly entered. The lady who called was the one who helped me filled up the form earlier the day.

I got a bit upset and angry, implying this should be her responsibility. She came back really quick saying that I have reviewed the signed the slip. OK, fine, we have to figure out solution, pointing fingers doesn’t help.

Although it turns out that I can do this transfer online, however, I was still upset. This is just like having the chopsticks placing on the dinning table being not parallel or perpendicular to the table edge. You can certainly eat with them the way they are but it is just not pleasant.

The Summer Palace

I went to hang out with my brother’s friend and her daughter in the summer palace on Sunday. Her daughter is totally not like her. My brother’s friend is an elegant, soft-spoken, long-leg lady. However, her daughter’s is almost like a mixture of a little boy and an 80-year old woman.

She resembles her dad, no doubt. What irritates me is her expressionless face and dead-fish eyes. She talks the whole lot deal but repeatedly talking about the same thing or idea. If you deliberately ignore her, she would nudge your arm with the back of her hand lightly, repeatedly and persistently, exactly like how old women do.

Very energetic yet not smart enough to entertain herself, she was running around with other kids. I was saying to myself, oh yeah, perhaps she is very good with making friends. Later I realized the boy was chasing after her only because she had hit him earlier.

The Foodie Heaven

Yummy roast pork belly dish (Mankit went there again with my mom's friend and took the picture)

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Foods in Hong Kong is certainly better. However, you need to know where to look. After meeting up with mom in the airport, we took the bus to the city center. While transfering in MongKok subway station, my mom asked me if I am hungry. Not really hungry since I carefully ate every single bite of my meal in the flight (my first meal of the day) but knowing my own mother, I nodded.

She bought me a drink (PS1) and made me wait at the corner at a crowded street. I was so bored because I finished my drink in one or two gulps. As I was counting how many people are crossing the street, she turned back from nowhere with 2 boxes. And we rushed home to enjoy the meals.

The roast pig belly was the famous dish in this local restaurant (永合隆). It seems like every one in KowLong knows about it. The box with the meat has got the hole on top, to let out the steam because the pork was just freshly out of the oven. If the steam is trapped in the box, the skin is going to be soggy. The skin was so perfectly crispy, while the meat is tender and fully of flavor. I almost wonder if I am eating a roast duck.

Perfect match with the Thai rice (PS2).

PS1. The drink was the specialty of Hong Kong. Cantonese thinks we need to constantly replenish our body and rebalance the ying and yang. Thus, the soft drink stores are very popular in Hong Kong. I was drinking the cold sweetened soup of some strange plant's root. It is supposed to cool down my liver.

PS2. It is very interesting that Hong Kong only import Thai fragrant rice. Very different from the rice in Taiwan, Taiwan rice is closer to Japanese rice, short grain and sticky. The Thai rice smell always make me think of Hong Kong.

Hong Kong Project Housing

I took 2 days off and flew to Hong Kong to meet with Mom. It has been ages since we hung out together in Hong Kong. It was a very pleasant memories after I grew up. I hated to go to Hong Kong every summer when I was a kid, those were the time my palates and wallet were not fully developed. Oh well, I wasn't too much of the shopping type (I prefer collecting financial products) but there are still a lot to see. The smell of Thai fragrant rice and steamed fish in the highly dense neighborhood is still one of my fondest childhood memories.

We stayed in the uncle Tomas's flat in LokFu, which is the government housing (project in New York state?). I guess that's the part of Hong Kong tourists won't see. The concentration of human beings living in a unit square feet is amazing. Hong Kong government really did the wonder of the world. Most of the apartment buildings have about 35 floors. Every floor has about 8 units. Every unit is about 500 square feet. Not quite impressive, however, imagine there are around 100 such buildings concentrated around one subway station?

Hong Kong government designs these type of housing with standardised models, models for the wall, models for the door, models for the drainange. Basically each floors were built exactly the same way to save cost. Of course, they are all made in Mainland China, then shipped to Hong Kong for the final assembly. You can easily be lost among these 100 identical buildings with identical smell of food and bleach.

There are shops, restaurants, supermarkets and traditional markets in the bottom floors, which are all interlinked. Of course, the subway station. There are endless people moving about the stair well, lifts, shops... I felt a bit suffocated. The stress of living in such an environment is beyond my imagination.

This flat is owned by uncle Tomas. Flats in this apartment complex were sold in discount to people who used to live in the government rental project. My mom's family (my grandmom, 3 uncles and my mom) used to live in the rental property, 250 square feet with only one sink. The sink is used for veggie washing and teeth brushing. The bathroom is about 16 square feet, it has one squater toilet in the middle. We need to cover it with a wooden board when taking a shower. However, it was such a new and fun idea to do that when visiting my grandmom in Hong Kong when I was a kid.

Although it still sounds terribly stressed, Uncle Tomas' flat now is considered pretty cool in Hong Kong. Of course, most people move out as soon as they can afford a non-government housing.

Beijing Bicycle

The spring finally came to Beijing, it was warm enough to cycle around again in Beijing. Amazingly my bicycle survived the winter, and was still locked up in the bycicle parking area. I think I have writen too much about the negative part of Beijing, I should give myself some positive energy boost.

Riding bicycle is so much fun. I feel so at ease when cycling around, inspite of the dust, polluted air and fume. There are filthy looking labour workers having a small bicycle service stall in every corner. My rear tire, paddle on the left and basket fixation were replaced in different stalls, since they broke down when I went around the city.

Those filthy looking labour workers might be farmers in the rural country side, they came to the big city for any chance that could make some money. They often don't have a proper place to live, not to mention the luxury of taking a shower. When needing help pumping up my tires, I only need to pretend I am so clumsy in finding where the valve is, they often offered helping hands.

Being Lazy or What?

They are eating hot pot without me... :-(

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I am sometimes thinking why is there so many small things that makes me feel angry. I mean, seeing the unprofessionalism always piss me off. I was flying with Air China to Tokyo last weekend, and being upgraded to the first class. The food was served in separate ceramic plates as other airlines do. However, the quality of food is so low that you really want to believe the hostess just replate them out of doggie bag.

The appetizer consists of a wedge of omelet, some mixed preserved veggie and salmon fish. How bad could that be? Believe me, it is just that bad. The chief made the Japanese style tamago yaki, however, putting in too much sugar. The mixed veggie are pure Chinese style, pungent with chilly oil and sesame oil fragrance, obviously doesn't go very well with the delicate smell of omelet. The dish came with the chicken stew sitting right next to the rice. Being microwaved, the rice in the bottom turned soggy. The ceramic didn't help, I completely lost my appetite. Every bit of the food tells you that this chief and this airline don't care what their customers are putting into their month. They are trying to copy what western style of first class service is, but are never too worried if they just got 50% right. That pisses me off.

Why cannot Air China think of a more innovative way to carry out the first class service? For example, serving food in separate plate individually already kills the true spirit of Chinese food (Chinese food needs to be served hot so to air the aroma of grease). If there is a way to serve food hot and let the wonderful smell stimulates passengers' appetite? Of course, while devicing a way to keep it safe? Those ideas might be too far from what they are now. But what they can do is to find some dishes that don't taste too awful after being baked in the oven for long, or even just separate the rice with a wax paper.

I believe they can have a lot of wonderful ideas though I am not very confident in their execution. But why is no one blowing the whistle, telling them what they consider the first class service has actually a lot of room for improvement?

Chinese Ghost Stories

When in London, I was hanging out with the anthropology study researchers from East Asia Study in LSE. One of the researchers has been dedicating her life into those girls who die before getting married. This book caught my attention naturally, it analyzes the ghost stories from Ming and Chin dynasties, trying to figure out how Chinese view death, after-life and how to make peace with it. It is pretty common feeling toward the dead, sarrow and fear. Feeling sad for the loss of the descease and fear of what it may become.

If the person died of an unnatural cause, the "Hun"(魂) will not rest until the mistake is corrected. For example, the murdurer is caught. The "Hun" is the backbond of ghosts. Also, there is another case where the "Hun" has died, but the "Po"(魄) remains. This creates monsters crawling out of the grave. Their hair and nails grow, they need to drink fresh animals' blood to survive, however, they don't recognise their families nor understand their lifes before death.

Chinese respect the dead family members yet are afraid of being haunted. That explains the ghost marriage. The parents would try to marry the pass-away daughter to a young man, dead or alive. Becasuse they fear the ghost of the daughter would come back and haunt them.

Xiamen

We had a presale meeting with a bank in Xiamen, I was dragged along with my manager for support and backup. But I think his true intention is to let me gain some presales experience and practice my Mandarin speaking in public.

I do struggle when speaking Mandarin in a formal setting, I constantly fumble around my brain to look for the accurate phase to use. I think if I talk in the way I feel comfortable (the way I talk to my parents), I might either sound like a rebelious adolescent or a 6 year old.
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My first time in Xiamen, arriving at night, the taxi drivers drove as if he is in a Formula car racing. Wow, that brings back so much nice memories. The local dialet is Hokkian, which is largely spoken in Taiwan. The Hokkian infused Mandarin is very easily identified. The "F" and the "R" sounds are never clear defined.

We went out for a late night snack, picked some fresh river shrimps and small razor shell clams. The shrimps were boiled to just cooked. Soy sauce with some minced garlic is the only dressing. Delicious. The small razor shell clams were quickly fried with scalion and chilly slices, mixed with soy sauce and rice wine. Yummy. I always wonder why we cannot enjoy foods like this in Northen China.

It is winter in Xiamen yet warm enough that smell the osmenthus moves around in the night. Xiamen is very nice and clean, less dust and filthy looking labour workers on the streets. Perhaps that's because it has less construction sites than Beijing.

The Ape in the Office

I am re-reading "the ape in the office"again, the Chinese version. I find that the translation is just simply lousy. Some of the passages are hard to understand because the logic wasn't translated precisely. The cause and consequence pair doesn't link with each other. Nevertheless, this is my only accesss.

In a part of the book, it describes how the ape in the high position usually demonstrates relax gesture among group while the lower-rank ape behave timidly. This can be observed in meeting room as well, the boss would come to the meeting, taking off the jacket and sit down with unapologetic face if being late. Some pick their noses or scratch behinds at ease.

In Tokyo airport today, I suspect my one of the fellow passengers, dress in suit, glued his snot on the plants next to the railing of the automatic walkway. (Or he is just touching the plant for fun?) Was he trying to show who is the boss?

How to become a Politician

This is the sequal of Go Fishing. The weather is really not very good...

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At Beijing project, the manager from our client's side is really a strange character. Actually, "manager" is not an accurate description of his position. In the China government environments, there is a strict managerial hieriachy. He is quiet high up.

He is the source of our stress most of the time. He visits the project room from time to time, roaming around and complaining about the product. He would pick up someone likc our project manager or lead consultant to scold, however, not from a contructive point of view, but only to release his anxiety. His complaints are mostly coming from shallow observation, he's not learned anything about the project since the project started a year ago. He is also not techincal enough to give meaningful advise. People under him started to avoid eye contact with him in the project room as well.

He thinks he should have writen the whole system by his team, rather than getting it from a vendor. What makes him most furious is that the decision was not made by him. It was repeatedly evaluated and tested (in other locations) for over 6 years, and the headquarter project was approved by managers above him.

I keep wondering why this type of character could survive this environment filled with people who have excelled the politican games (this is Beijing, afterall). I thought his character is what the communist party would admire. He is basically ignorant (thus consequently loud and scornful because of his insecurity) and full of unjustified confidence. But which managers could endure the face slapping unlimitedly supplied by their subordinates? His managers must be more intellengent than that? The only reasonable explanation is that he will be the scapegoat if project fails. But he is not seeing this coming himself? Hard to believe.

The Animals that don't Know How to Laugh

My brother claimed where the arrow pointing is the baby's penis. I am very skeptical about it...

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Remember in my earlier post I have described how those public transportation workers never smile and are always harsh when serving people?

I have found the answer in this incident. I was trying to recharge my subway card in the station so waiting in a queue. There was only one guy before me. As he spoke to the lady, another man (filthy looking labour worker) came from the side, reached in the window waving a 5 yuan bill asking for a luggage ticket. The lady gave him the change and ticket, of course, the transaction with the man before me was cut off.

The man turned furious, he yelled at the lady behind the window, questioning if she knows there is a queue. She protested, however, his voice was so loud that I cannot hear her. He is not getting the answer he wanted (what did he want, anyways?), he started fisting the window repeatedly and heavely, of course, at the same time, shouting. After a few minutes of violence, he left with anger. The lady behind the desk returned to her normal long face in a fraction of minute, asking me, "what do you want?"

Snow in Beijing

Coming back from Tokyo last weekend, Beijing was raining so hard and freezing cold. The moist turned into snow the next day. It was very spring-like before. Coming back from a-month long trip, my flat smelled awful because all the windows were locked.

I started to scrubb the toilet, shower area. Kneeling on the floor and wipe clean every inch of the kitchen area. Down almost a bottle of bleach in every drainage. Shut the bathroom sink, leave the used tea leaves on top of the drainage cover, I also tried the used coffee powder. Nothing seems to work. I went to buy the strong air refreshener and odour obsorber, let's hope it is going to work today.

Coming to the office and complaining this to my Beijing colleagues, he explained that is because the drainage pipe was old and the valve was damaged. Also, the heating only worse the rotten egg smell in a confined environment. No one really know what to do with it.

I was actually living in the very expensive apartment, which has 24-hour doorman, bright and airy hallway, well-managed communal area. Most of the residence are foreigners or wealthy locals. All these give me a very good sense of security. My new flat is in between the real local (no lift, nothing is managed) and super upscale residences. There are lifts, with survalliance camera. The doorman sometimes disappears, definitely not 24 hours. And he doesn't care who is in or out of the building. My neighbours are very native. Once getting out of this apartment complex, there are lots of filthy-looking labour workers.

I worry about my personal security when coming home late from work , I worry about getting breakins. I am slightly getting more relax about my new flat now (apart from the funny odour), though I still carry my valuables with me at all time. I sleep fully dressed, also sleep right next to my passport and wallet. I check windows twice before taking a shower or going to bed.

Happy Birthday Manjit

Nigara Falls Ontario and Happy Birthday to Manjit

Does It Matter?

The sign to the toilet at the moutain top in Yamanashi. It explains that the women's toilet has great view and the men's toilet has ordinary view.

Go Fishing

Dad and Ilan at the sea... I think this picture is so cooooooool

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This is my first Chinese New Year at home after leaving Taiwan when I was 17 years old. I decided to do all things we used to do when we were kid. So I planned this fishing trip with my dad. Mankit tagged along and volunteered to drive.

That wasn't exactly the very good day to fish, the sky was grey and it was drizzling. The rain flew horrizontally and we didn't catch anything but a small crab. The crab was carrying loads of eggs in her stomach, we dropped her back to the sea to raise children.

Ilan was very excited and kept sniffing my lunch box. I fed him the left over bait, the frozen raw shrimps. My dad was worried that Ilan might get sick but I insisted that's the delicious sasimi. Oh well, I must be hungry myself.

Yamanashi Onsen

Yukata fitting... before we drank up all beer and wine we brought. Mai and I sent out to the famous Onsen village in Yamanashi.

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Mai's friend is the Japanese hotel's daughter, the hotel has more than 100 years of history and she is the 4th generation. Because of the different management style between she and her mother, she decided to get married to flee away from the business. Oh well, that is a solution.

Mai's other friend told us her disastrous dating experience. The guy brought her to the raman place on their first date. She paid for herself by placing an one thousand yen bill in the tray and walked out the store to wait for her date. He didn't give back the changes. What's more, he thinks she should pay for his part of his parking fee since he is going to give her a lift to the train station. Wow, there must be a reason for him being single at his age and I think it is so unusual to see a Japanese man who doesn't care about losing face. So I asked Mai's friend for his phone number but she thought I was joking.

When telling my mom this story, she looked at me with unbelieving face "It's so obvious that the guy is doing all those to disgust your friend so she won't even think about calling him again". "You girls are really too naive".

Japanese Custome

Getting ready for the heavy dose of alcohol, Mike was in the state of extreme ecstacy.


Akiko-san is trying to show me how the big fish looks like, I am very impressed.



Still the most sober one among the group at 2 am in the morning. Akiko-san later bit me at my shoulder and I don't know why?

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I was very curious how Japanese man pee in man's room. Well, you know, girls think it is very embarassing to make sound when peeing, they have to flush the toilet or play some flushing music to cover the sound, how about guys? What should you do when your male boss walks into man's room while you are doing your business? Do you pretend you are concentrating so hard at your thing that you cannot say hi? Or you just casually turn your head and nod?

I was told that it is ok to make sound when releasing yourself in men's room. I get upset a little and determine not to play with the toilet flush when I pee in Japan. Hey, this is double standard.

Anyways, Japanese people are so trained to be nice to others. It is the most unbearable guilt to burden others. You see people nod at your when entering the lift, bow when leaving the lift. The direction they bow is carefully calculated, it is toward the corner of the opening door so her/his pereferential eye sight covers the people remaining in the lift. She/he is not directly sending the bow at you but you can feel the action (so that you don't feel obliged to reply). The last person would press the Close button and withdraw her/his hand swiftly before the door shuts.

Around 2 or 3 years ago, Tokyo area starts the custom to flash the hazard light 3 times to show the driver's gratitute toward the fellow drivers who give ways to the former. It is almost as cute as the smilies in MSN, non-verbal, nearly comical yet easy to understand. My friend said he gets quite annoyed if the driver he gave favor to forgets to do that. I think people might abuse this custom thinking it is OK to take advantage of other drivers as long as I show my appreciation? However, this doesn't worry Tokyo drivers, they are just too concerned about others to commit such a crime.

I don't like Manila

I had heard bad stories about a traveler being strained in Manila airport. Every officers asked him for bribe and he lost his boarding pass when taking a nap. Not a problem to have a replacement, if he could afford to pay the fee...

That's really not a big deal, I said to myself. The hotel is going to pick me up, I don't think I need to withdraw any pesos for this 3 day trip in Manila. The airport is old and seems like it hasn't be properly renovated after Phillipine's hay days in the 70s. No big deal. I hoped on the limo and went straight to the Manila Pennisula.

There is actually no high way connecting the airport with the city. The road was not even, the car went pass quite slumy areas until we were at the heart of the financial district. 15 minutes ride costs me 1400 peso, which is around 30 bucks. Wow, this is close to the Manhattan taxi fare from LaGuardia. The hotel is very nice, what surprised me was the limo had to go through a security check at the gate. After dropping me off, my handbag and luggage were searched again. There are around 3 security guards, 5 valet parking guys and 4 bellboys standing around the entrance to the lobby. It seems like they don't have anything more interesting to do.

I was going to meet with Kate Porter at the breakfast loundge before going to the bank. 2 days in a row, Kate and I both asked for coffee and I have got the lousy filter coffee when Kate is getting the fresh brew straight from the expresso machine. I was really getting annoyed the second day and asked the waiter why I am getting different coffee? I pushed away the filter coffee and said please bring me the fresh coffee. Is Manila Peninsula training their staff not to serve fresh coffee to orientals because they don't know how to appreciate it?

Everything is about peso. My hotel room costs twice as much as in Kuala Lumpur but what I feel is insult. Not until I checked out, did I realise that breakfast was not included. This is again not clearly stated when I checked in, or Manila Peninsula think it is the right way to do business?

I was informed that there is a "departure tax" imposing on any traveler leaving Manila airport. But I was really disgusted by this country and couldn't want to run my credit card to withdraw cash. I asked the hotel to settle the tax for me. There is a small fee associated with it, that's fine with me as long as I don't need to go out to the cash machine where lots of people hanging around aimlessly. The taxi is arranged, I walked straight to the taxi and got to the airport, again, with Manhattan taxi fare.

The airport is definitely chaotic. It is not well lit, there are things stuffed in every stackable place. There are security guards wearing no uniforms but a badge in different size and age. The queue is moving like snail crawl but no airport personelle seemed to mind. There are large group of oversea workers trapped in one corner in the airport, I have no idea what are they waiting for, but everyone has a very huge luggage. The check-in line moved as slowly as any other line. The funny thing is that there are 2 large weight scales blocking the real entrance of the check-in queue, as if the situation is not chaotic enough. The JAL people need to weight every passenger's check-in luggage. Oh, that is because there is no scale in the check-in counter. Gee....

After 1 hour wait and I've checked in and you cannot imagine what type of ecstatic state I was in. I went to the counter to show the officer that I have paid my airport tax, he was scratching his head really hard. Oh, no, no, no, the hotel charged me for the fee but they are supposed to give me the cash advance so to pay for the tax. The idiot at the check out didn't give me the money! I was almost bursting into tear in front of the officer, thinking that I might miss my flight and I have to spend one more night in this country?

They let me call the hotel, who has realised their mistake and said that they can give me the money through their representative office. But that's in the arrival level! Panicking, I ran across the queue toward the only exit of the departure level. The floor was so nicely cleaned that my boots' heel skipped and my left ankle sprained. I didn't realise how bad it was, trying to stand up with only one thought that my flight is leaving in 30 minutes, but my left ankle was so wounded that it couldn't stand the pressure. I fell again, really hard this time. I limped through my journey back to Tokyo with tears. I don't want to go back to Manila.

Hiroko

It is not easy to write about Hiroko. She is just not a typical Japanese woman all around. She is amazingly beautiful. She is stout yet delicate. Angular jaw line with very feminine compoisition of eyes and nose. Timeless hairstyle, which is straight long hair to lowerback length. Broad shoulder and definitely not slim body build however shows a sort of gracefulness because of her elegant demeanor. She never wears fancy outfits, but you feel comfortable and at ease when having her around. She is so square, steady and trustworthy. I guess she is at her late 40's and one of the few very very confident women I have met. Perhaps her confidence comes from the fact that she is not seeking anyone's aproval. And this, I believe, is what she was born with.

In a society with sheep syndrom (if everyone has a Louise Vutton bag, I have to have one), Hiroko's survival is an oddity. She never tries to pretend who she is not. She is the one I can let go my pee and make it as loud as possible and when she is in the bathroom with me. Of course, she knows what to say and what to give so to show politeness to others but you always feel the sincerity. There is no excessive wordings to hide shyness or exaggerate the gratitue, she is always herself. When she says something, she means it. Although her English is not fluent, I can sort of move along her way of thinking pretty good.

Working very hard and very smart, she sometimes lives inside her own world. When in California, I think Hiroko heard Susie banging on the keyboard and swearing "F*ck Me!". She then came to me and asked "What difference is f*ck you and f*ck me?". I was like... "Um... it depends who is on the top...". Hiroko continued, still very puzzled, "but technical impossible".

Po Bronson

I am reading Po Bronson's "What should I do with my life". He's interviewed with more than 900 people and composed this book with real stories. Uh... I always hate those self-help or spiritual books, however, this book has caught my attention perhaps because I am genuinely gossipy, I want to peep into other people's life (in the name of inspiration). I never understand why people can trust those so called motivational leader or buy the ticket to the enpower-yourself seminar.

There were 2 types of job wranglers in his book. One of them worked her way through the boom, made her mark, changed the world and jump because she feels there is nothing more to do. The other one is purely hopping around because she doesn't really know what she is after. It is darn easy to be after the prestigeous job, big name and good salary. In fact, Po has given this type a nick name "phi beta slacker". This is really scary, this is exactly me!

On my way to Manila, which I have heard so many horrible stories about the airport and the country.

Sexy Version of Dancing Queen

I love Hiroko.

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I was invited to join Tokyo office's consultant's day in the hot spring resort Hakone. The osen has 5 different bath pools, Hiroko grabbed the small window of time before the Karaoke (if you are in Japan long enough, you know that party is incompleted without a Karaoke) and 16 course dinner, gave me the orientation.

We quickly changed into the hotel kimono, ran to the osen (hot spring). Undressed, put away the kimono in basket, rinsed our feet, showered (hot spring ettieque), dipped into the indoor hot spring for 2 minutes, then moved outdoor to the second osen with banboo fence. The air was chilly, but you felt alright as long as you bury your body under the 45C water and the moonlight. Haaaaaaaaaaaah... is the only sound I can make.

Hiroko then got out and walked down the hill, oh, there are another 2 osens, the water temperature is higher, we spent 3 minute each, just like a kid go lose in a candy shop, we were so keen to try every osen with different view of the mountain. Anyways, our after-dinner dip didn't last very long because we didn't want to delay the Karaoke party.

Not everyone was there but we started singing anyways. ABBA's dancing queen was ordered and the MTV was totally unmatching the song. It was showing naked girls all along! Difficult to get over the shock and embarassment, everyone was half giggling and singing. When Akiko arrived, we suggested her to sing the dancing queen and some one keenly ordered the song for her. However, she finished the whole song with straight face!

P.S. it is very difficult to get hyperactive without over exposing your flesh in hotel kimono. I was sooooooooooo embarassed.

Who is going to Inspect Your Room

Fuji mountain from Hakone. After 3 transfers and 4 different transportation, I finally arrived in the place where I can see the mountain. All tourists came the same way, I somehow felt very paranoid and tired. Isn't this supposed to be relaxing?

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For some strange reasons, I keep my living space tidy as if some one would come and inspect my room without notifying me. I scrapped my bath tub, meticulously clean the stove and mop the floor every day despite the fact I am as tired as a dog after work. I just cannot bear the thought that someone might come to my apartment when I am not around. My principle is to hide the trace of a living human being has been in this space.

Before departing for a business trip, I shut down electricity and gas, remove the garbage, make sure there is not shred of smell left in the kitchen and bathroom apart from the heavy chlorine scent. Dispose all foods (that was usually carefully calculated, little is wasted) from the fridge. Painstakingly go over my wardrobe, everything has to be folded neatly as if no one has ever lived here. You cannot tell who I am from my flat, there are definitely no personalities. The only thing that might give it away was the books I am reading.

In hotel room things are not getting any better, when I leave the room, everthing is stowed or hidden, yes, no one is staying in this room tonight. I just cannot truely relax. Those places are not my permenant to me, I always feel I am on the go any minute.

Mai Tai Dinner

Meeting up with Mai last time in Tokyo....



Meeting Mai this time in Tokyo... Mai can drink. Our usual drinking program is like this, start with 2 pints of larger, fellow by 2 small bottles of sake and then Shuijiu to end. I had little problem finding my way back to the hotel.

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I was reading an very interesting article http://www.jref.com/culture/misconceptions_prejudices.shtml , written by a Kaijin (foreigner) living in Japan for ages. The homogeneous society, heavily indoctrinated by the uniformed education system, have quite a few misconception and prejudices about westerners according to the article. Such as Kaijings are all american and Japan is a very small country. The author has given quite a powerful arguement indicating that Japan is actually not a small country compare to most European countries. Some other issues such as Japanese do not know that 1st Jan is not the traditional New Year until late 19th centry an so on. I think the author is a too critical, you can produce similar arguement with any other countries in the world (or in the universities, ha ha).

One thing that the article has indicated is the lack of critical thinking training in the education system, or the society requires every one to conform, rather than being skeptical. Well, I guess that is one of the survival principles. You do have to pay the price to be different, only those with strong nerves and determination can do. Why not being lazy?

However, there is no doubt that Japanese culture has very strong influence. The advance economic has bred the super neat, convenient environment. Perhaps that's the obvious way of life to pursuit?

Yokohama Hakkejima Aquarium

The polar bear in the aquarium. I cannot help but think they are all suffering from some sort of mental disease. The sea elepants/fishes/squid/sharks/turtles move around the water in a fixed pattern, going from one end to another, back and forth, as if they are meditating, or trying to perfect the movement like gymnasts. They must be bored as hell, serving the life sentence for unknown reasons.

I feel very sorry that I like to go to aquarium so much.

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Walking about Tokyo is a very nice thing to do. People are all very well dressed from head to toes (shoes). Girls all have very agreeable skin. Many thanks to the advanced technology. The high art of putting on make up is so that you don't feel she has applied anything to her face. But you do see some fake tan that is very pronounced, with the light brown hair and bright blue eye-shadow, one of my Tokyo colleague calls them "Orange Girl".

I also feel the pressure to make myself presentable but am really too lazy to find out which type of powder would do the best for my eczma attacked face.

Funny Translation

XiaoHo was having a fever on and off last weekend, the doctor in the first clinic simply prescribed some anti-biotics. My mom insisted to get the second doctor's opinion. And they found out XiaoHo's ear was seriously infected. Another battle won.

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The standard Mandarin was consider the standard, official and civilised language in Modern China. However, many local dialets preserves the sounds and tones of the ancient Chinese. Take the Chinese poems for example, the choice of characters and arrange of tones are formatted so that they can be read out loud beautifully. But Mandarin pronounciation has blended the "Ze" tone into the 1, 2, 3 or 4 tone. The "Ze" tone is short and quick, as if you narrow the air passage and stop the sound-making in a haste.

Mandarin also rips off those creative and interesting phrases. For example, in some dialet, butterfly is called "拍翼", which means clapping wings. In Mandarin, butterfly is a none, means butterfly. Don't you think "clapping wings" almost has slapped the moving insect in the visual comprehension area of your brain?

Different regions develop their own way of describing things. The phrases might be different but they can still be understood by Chinese because we can connect the individual Chinese character's meaning together and reach the concludion. Take the disposable culinaries for example, in Taiwan, chopsticks, spoon or knife are prefixed by "wash-free". However, in China, the prefix is "use only one time"(一次性). But I am sure people from both sides of Taiwan Straight know what you are refering to either way.

However, in some cities of China, the English translation of disposible chopsticks is "one-time sex chopstick". The character, "性", could mean the nature of an item/thing/event or sex.

Drainage

I came back from Kuala Lumpur one day early to hunt for a flat on Friday evening because I have to move out of my flat on the next day. I have done a bit of research before leaving for KL 2 weeks ago and understood the type of flat I am going to get for my budget. I think the estate agent is very clever, she showed me one flat in a very crappy condition and then a slightly better one with higher price. I almost decided on the spot.

It is very dangerous to be trapped into so-called new development in Beijing, where half of the buildings are still under contruction. Your neighbours on all directions are also renovating. The communal areas are filled with tiles and workers wheel in tons of sands. All this is for the previliage of sitting on a brand new toilet bow. Suppose not the new buildings, then the local Beijing housing. They are very depressing. They are mostly 6 story high (to avoid complaints if higher?) without lifts. The hall ways s eternally lit by 40W light bulb, I think they do it on purpose so that you don't see the sinister stainon the wall. The interior are usually ill-lit and cheap furniture-filled. The saddest thing is the bathroom. What is the issue with seperating the wet and dry area? The shower was installed right next to the wash machine and toilet. Wouldn't it be nice to step onto a dry, clean bathroom mat after a long and hot shower? How do people put on pants if the whole floor was wet and slippery?

My flat was not all that better. It is a good size studio without doors to the toilet and kitchen. Amatuer home developer's work. However, the wooden carboard and throughout slate-like tiles make it look quite modern. The best thing is that the bathroom is very very well-lit, however, the drainage gives out the funny odor. I pour some bleach into the drain and then boiling hot water to clean it, however, the smell persists.

I was always wondering why the 2 pieces of drainange pipe were bent into the a rollercoaster loop under the bathroom sink. I just realised that is to let the water flow through but prevent the funny odor from flying freely between the main drainage pipe to your bathroom. I can only shut the sink stop and brush my teeth in the kitchen.

Good Bye WeiVoon

I think the work-related social events I attend in my company is farewell lunch/dinner/drink. This is WeiVoon's farewell dinner, you get only a card from your colleagues if you only stay with us for less than 2 years.




But if you are joining our clients' work force, you can get a small present.

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I don't know if you have similar experience about irritating strange/colleague/friend's smell. Body order is of course getting on my nerves, however, they are more bearable comparing to what I am going to talk about.

The garlic breath and strong perfume (the not very expensive one) has the power of destroying my mood (I become so irritate and ready to kill). Smell is really very powerful. For those you don't want to see, you simply concentrate on your monitor. For those you don't want to hear, put on the headset. But smell has legs, it finds its way to your nastrils with ease (sometimes it attacks my eyes, especially the garlic breath).

In Beijing, I find you sorted of meet with the garlic breath more often than the south. I don't understand because I think southern Chinese cook with garlic generously. But one time I walked into the meeting room, which filled with people just came back from lunch, oh the air... I could barely open my eyes.

I just encountered another smell disaster this week. The lady I worked with in the bank wears this very strong perfume. So thick that you can smell it 3 feet away. I don't know if that's not so expensive perfume or not, but I think it is quite not adequet to wear such thick scent in workplace (in fact, anywhere). The unpleasant smell stabbed my nerve during the whole time sitting next to her. I just pretended that I had a running nose or I am thinking deeply so to cover my nose with my hand while talking to her.

Women are keepers of sex and men keeper of romance

I was reading a book written by 2 bartenders in New York, about the art of picking up gals/guys in pub. Well, they kept claiming that if you can train yourself so that you are not timid when walking into a social situation, you can walk into a job interview, in-laws eye sights, public bath house with the same confidence.

Hey, aren't you talking about picking up a stranger from the pub? These 2 bartenders are so trying hard to sell the book.

Goddness of Parametric VaR

It is very interesting to recall the Value at Risk (VaR) knowleges I read in various papers, documents about 5 years ago. In the past week, I pull off the training session for a bank on this subject I didn't have much preparation for. Back in those time, the theoretical stuff didn't make much sense then (it could be that my brain wire circuits have not been completed yet). I simply chew and swollow the facts and theories without connecting them together. Now I think it was a miracle that I have survived. Perhaps it just takes time to let the raw knowledge sit and brew into something useful.

I am Not Nice

As growing older, I found myself more and more impatient. I cannot stand those who are slow and unobservant. I give up explaining nicely, I usually take more aggresive measure to show my unsatisfaction.

I breakfast in the hotel restaurant this morning. Leisurely browsing my newspaper and wait for my first cup of coffee. I had noticed there are a couple of manager-like persons standing around the corner of the loundge, one of the slicky looking manager walked pass my table every 5 minute, I guess that's his routine walk. He didn't notice that no one has served me coffee or tea. Fine, I waited again. Couple of the waitresses passed by my table to clean up the table next to me or collecting finished plates, still no one came and asked me "tea or coffee". I am getting impatient but decided to wait for another 5 minutes. Nothing has happened after the manager passed my table the 3rd time.

I am getting annoyed. So I stood up, walked across the dining hall to the coffee and tea counter with my coffee cup. I said to another manager politely, if I can have a cup of coffee. She said, you meant you want to have another cup of coffee? I said I have never had coffee ever since I sat down. She apologised and promised to bring me fresh brew coffee in no time.

This incident can be resolved by waving the waitress to my table and explaining my demand. But I do prefer to embarrass the managers by showing how incompetent the staff is. Why shouldn't I show my anger?

My Mom's Strict Sense of Rightdoings

The thing started with the location of my aunt and uncle's hotel booking. It was located in the west end of Taipei city, used to be the most prosperous area in the 70s, however, the glory had faded with the development of of east side of Taipei. The area is very close to the Taipei central station. Streets are narrow, many of the buildings are old were built in the Japanese colonial time. The composit of inhabitants are more complex. People came from the village found their first foot hole here.

My mom's first reaction to the address is that's a area filled with prostitutes. She always draws the line between good and evil women very strictly. In her mind, those women who work in pubs, nightclubes are all classified as prostitutes, regardless whether she is the manager, janitor, or hostess. They should be all condemned for making money by selling their bodies.

That's very harsh generalisation. I think this area can better present Taipei's past and present comparing to the multi-national hotel chain. Not to confront my mother, I told my aunt and uncle that the area has a lot of historical buildings, many nice eataries with stories and Taiwanese flavor. Indeed, there are hostess bars and pubs around, but if not hanging out too late at night, I think you are safe.

We all make our living one way or another, there is no clear cut of what type of job is superior than the other. If there is demand, supply follows. Actually, I even admire those who can survive in this tough environment. I don't quit understand why is she so hostile toward this industry, is it threatening her life at one time? It shouldn't be now.

My Brother's Wedding

My sister-in-law's dress was the typical Cantonese (or rather Hong Kong) style. Quite a different taste to the western white dress. This picture was taken in the registration hall in Taipei.

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I'd never imagine how exhausted it is to have a full set of Chinese wedding. My brother's wedding is already simplified, mind you. The ceremonies and procedures of getting Carol, my sister-in-law, into Liao's family started at night of December 28th. In the afternoon, Grace and I went to arrange the decoration for the black Mercedeze and flower bouquat. And then My brother and I picked up our first guest, Jessica, from Singapore and sent her to the hotel. My brother rehearsed the procedures the next day.

On 29th, Carol is going to go to have the bridal make up session by 6am and she is going to farewell her parents. Carol needed to be accompanied by a young, unmarried female friend, which is Jessica, during the whole day.

After getting home before midnight, we realised that the black Mecedeze was not washed because Grace and my mom had taken XiaoHo to the Dentist and missed the Car Wash appointment. Grace, Mankit and I then started to wash the car in the dark, raining cold night until 2am.

My brother was painstakingly detailed person, he has outlined the script-like schedule, who is going to do what at what time, items needed, etc. For example, Carol and Mankit were going to knee in front of Carol's parents, officially breaking the tie with her family. In returns, Carol's parents would make a short speech and give the couple 2 red envelopes. So, the items needed during the morning are, pillows (so to cushion the couple's knees), tea cups, trays and red envelopes.

The funny bit is that no one seems to know exactly what are the correct customs. Carol's family is Taiwan based, they have some ideas about how things should be conducted (such as Carol's brother has to pour a bucket of water after the car while they drive off to our home, to symbolise a married daughter just like water poured cannot be recovered). My mom has some ideas from her region, such as getting a well-off middle age woman (a woman with hudsband, kids, parents on both sides) to umbrella Carol to the car to shelt off the evil spirit.

When in doubt, my brother would call Grace's mother, who is almost 70 something. Such as, "do you know what the bride has to bring home 3 days after the marriage? The sweet rice balls soup? How many bows are needed?". Grace's mom would then call all her friends to gather information and give Mankit a summary like "Oh, nowaday people think it is very inconvenient to bring home liquid soup in car, you can substitue it with 12 round apples. Round shape has the same meaning as completeness and apples are sweet". Ah... that's how custom has evolved over generations.

Anyhow, my name only appeared in the script at page 3. My only task is to avoid seeing Carol until she is in Liao's family. My mother's explanation is so that you two can get alone with each other. Fine, I was then sent to run the errands while the whole ceremonies happening, Carol and Mankit kneed again in front of my parents after coming home and so on. But I have a important task to do is to buy Bento boxes for lunch (only then, I am allowed to see everyone, sigh).

I was instructed to buy the lunch boxes from a shop, which I couldn't find. I was not very familiar with my neighborhood. Painicking of being late, I drove to 7-11 and bought all their cheapo lunch boxes (7-11 has branded it as citizen lunch box). When I turned up at my door step, everyone is cracking up because my brother had predicted what I am going to bring home.

Fine then... After a whole half day of hassle, we finally got Carol.

As my mom, Grace, XiaoHo, Carol, Mankit and I were having the leisure breakfast in our little community coffee shop the next morning, XiaoHo looked at Carol and then turned to Grace "Today she is not pretty". This little brat, he likes woman with heavy make up and false lashes.

When the upper beam is not level, the lower beam tilts

This is an old Chinese saying, implying if the parents or seniors are not setting up the correct model for the yongsters, they tend to wrong doings.

One day I went back to Taipei, Mankit was so eager to show me something and took me to the kitchen. He kept saying this old Chinese saying which I didn't quite comprehend at the time. He then pulled open 4 or 5 carboard doors that is around knee to hip height. And then, XiaoHo came in, quickly closed all doors... with his right foot. I then realised that my mom sometimes close the carboard door or touch off the TV set switch with her foot while she is holding XiaoHo.

Headscarf

In Kuala Lumpur, most mulsim women wear headscarves, even the 3 year old has the tiny scarf around her head. But it came in different shades and styles. Why is the religion so afraid of women exposing their hair? The common answer comes like it is to prevent provoking men's sexual thoughts. If men are so brainless that they can be aroused by women's hair? The teaching is really beyond me.

However, according to newsweek (in responding to some European countries' upheavals of headscarves), wearing headscarves was not in the original Muslim doctrines. It starts with the Arabic women trying to distinguish themselves from those non-believers.

I just feel that is the very useful tool to impede a girls' freedom. It is hard to imagine a headscarf-wearing girl going backpacking in south American countries... Well, she would die of starvation because nothing is halal anyways.

Wanatabe Junichi

I am reading Junichi's (渡辺淳一) essay collection. This guy was famous in writing story about extra-marital affair. One of his very popular work was the story a couple, each of them married to someone else, decided to end their shameless happiness in death. The novel was successful largely because Junichi has meticulously described the extreme ecstatic state of this couple's immoral sex. For them, there is no way out. Even if there is a way to be together, they can only see the passion and flame to die down. Thus, they decide to stop their whole world at the climax.

Junichi has some quite interesting ideas, such as being honest is never what we, as human beings, are very good at, that's why we were repeatedly told to be honest.

The Curse of Golden Flowers

It has been very very long time since I walked out of a movie last time. But I have not been to any movie for quite a while. Given the cynical level I am in now, I should be walking out of movies a lot more often if I were a regular movie goer.

I think this movie makes the end of Zhang YiMou. He is running out of tricks to lure westerners, not even Gong Li and Chow Yun Fat can breath hope into this piece of trash. There is no logic, no reasoning of why the king (Chow Yun Fat) wanted to kill the queen (Gong Li). Most scenes were taken place in the too colourful, obsessively ornated interior of a palace. I wonder how that feels to wake up in such a place after a long night of drinking.

The history background was all so wrong, since the background was set in the late Tang dynasty (around 9th centry), where the empire was split into 5 large clans and 10 other smaller clans. And then, the palace scene was film in forbidden city, which only became the capital after Yuan dynasty (13th century). The only eye-catching scene is how those parlor maids dressed in Tang dynasty fashion, showing off their breasts in everyway they can. They dress in something very similar to the western corset, which squeezes up the 2 pockets of white meat, that trembles while the ladies walk. It is actually a scary scene, I am telling you. But I admire Zhang's effort to find so many pretty looking girls with delicate skin.

If Zhang is trying to impress the west with the fantasy-like late-Tang dynasty culture, he should have paid more attention to the details. Even I can tell, in the close up, the handkerchif Gong Li used to dry up her sweat looks like the cheap nylon sold in sourvernir shop in Bejing Capital airport.

The Mask of Mr. Polite

It is not unnatural to see a someone wearing mask on the street/office/department stores in Japan. It might be because the person is coming down with a cold or just sneezes too much. I think it is because that you might spray the bacteria when sneezing and get your colleagues sick as dog for days. Whether it works or not is not important, it is more important that you have shown that you care.

My mom said that she felt that she was scrutinised when touring around Japan few years ago. Well, I guess that's because she definitely looks different from other Japanese middle age women yet she is not western looking. Perhaps the scrutinisation is more like a wondering, what is made of this middle-age women with no make up, no heels and no hudsband accompanied?

I have read about Japanese culture, such as that lady should not make a sound when peeing and it is impolite to blow your nose in public. It is all coming about the guilty feelings that my action might make others to feel uncomfortable. Perhaps the rule of thumb is "if you don't want to be treated in a certain way, then prevent yourself from treating others the way". However, I guess I prefer the girl in the stall next to me is peeing rather than playing with the toilet flush (they overuse the flush to hide the sound). How the custome started at the first place? That would be a interesting thing to know.

Anyhow, I try not to hold it in if there is someone else in the lady's room in the office. I would clean the toilet seat, pretend to struggle with the zipper, etc until the other person has left. I guess I am more self-concious then I thought I am.

The Essential of Being Honest

Yanagi san and Akiko took me out playing pachinko at my last night in Tokyo. I am really curious to see the weird elements in Japan. It is said, the combination of pinball and slot machine place is the hangout for them. I even read the section in the tour book explaining how to play Pachinko. "Smoking is compolsury because you have nothing to do other than letting the little steel balls eat away your investment". But we went to the big arcade, which is not a real Pachinko place, because Yanagi san thinks that suits my age more. Sigh...

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I am always very curious about what are behind morality. What makes us tell right from wrong (whether to do the right thing or wrong is the other question). I guess we all feel the pressure to behave in a way that's acceptable by our society. Following the rules or common sense would guarantee you not being bother by stranger's dirty looks, elders' displine or law enforcement.

The moral standard is then formed by the rule - I am a good man/woman suppose doing all that agreed by society. Cool, women wearing scarf is moral, because it is a sin not to wear it in Koram. Actually, that's the only counter example that comes to my head at the moment.

But I was told a piece of information that washing your hands after toilet is actually washing away the anti bacteria substance our hands produce. It is not good for your own health, but I am not sure whether it is going to be a threat to those who religiously wash their hands. Do we do this because we are concerned to bring disease to others?

At least for me, washing hands after toilet is a show for your fellow toilet goers. Nevertheless, I've grown used to washing hands even there is no one else to inspect me (Relax, my friends, my hands were alright clean when picking up the french fries from your plates).

Anyways, I asked people whether you would give back the extra change suppose the teller has made a mistake. Most people do. I think that's because we subconciously want to be given this allowance when we make such a silly mistake? What if you realise the world is not as forgiving as we were told? Would you still give back the change?

Nationalism Franatics

I have read somewhere that a Japanese soldier's young wife killed herself right next to her sleeping husband so that he can wake up in her blood because she wanted to encourage him to completely devote himself to the country and not to be distracted by missing her. He became the cruelest warrior in China during world war II.

Hotel Survival Guide (2)

6. A pair of scissors

You will never know how important it is to have a pair of scissor in your room. And it is quite odd to ask for one from the front desk (they gave you this strange look as if you are going to disect some frogs in the bath tub). Anyhow, it is just so useful beyound your imagination. For example, you just bought a pair of nice jeans and really want to wear it to the pub downstair. However, the price tag stripe was so strong that the mediocre toy scissors in the sewing kit wouldn't do a thing. Or you would like to cut/pry/stab open the canned peanuts from the mini bar (for some reason, the easy-open can is very easy and the handle is very easy to break). You just need to be careful that a pair of scissor might destroy your plan not to check in any luggage.


7. Nail files

The worse way to find out that there is a sprinter coming out of your thumb nail is when the sprinter pulls a tiny, wheeny thread out of your stockings when pulling them up/down. You can basically do nothing but feel depressed for a minute. Man, that's the second pair today. You need to fix any split ends or suspicious disarray in your nails, aggressively and obssessively.

8. hat and socks made of thick, warm, soft materials

Remember the stronger than normal air conditioning (as if electricity doesn't cost them a dime, of course, we pay for it). There is a danger to get very very sick by catching a cold, especially in Kuala Lumpur. The temperature contrast is too huge. Toward the end of my stay, I had to switch off the air condition at night, however, feeling suffocated in the morning. The trick I use is to wear a wool hat and socks, put on my only jumper before going to bed. This really works!

9. Chopsticks

I once bought some nice cup noodles back to the hotel, thinking to spend my night with happy web surfing and hot noodles. When my favorite web blog is on and noodles are done, I only came to realise that the d*mned 7-11 didn't give me chopsticks. My only 2 choices are my fingers and the pen. I used the pen at the end because the noodles was really too hot, hey, I chew my pen anyways, what is the difference?

10. Painkiller

Do I have to say anything more about this?

11. Wine opener

I remember one time my friends and I were trying anything handy to open a wine bottle desperately in the skiing carbin. We used screwdriver, hair pin, steak knifeThe cork remains were floating on top of the surface of wine in our glasses and bottle.

Hotel Survival Guide

If you are planning to stay in one hotel for more than 1 week, there are quite a few items that you should not forget to bring with you:

1. Super antiseptic cream, perferrably with steroid

Forget about how bad steroid can do to your skin, you don't want to set yourself in a completely unfamiliar environment with a huge acne on your nose (or near your nose). You need that confidence to arm your timidity in a foreign country. The cream can be used heavely at the pimple spot, be careful not to spread it around. Gee, just let this bit of skin burned, I don't care, as long as the pimple doesn't grow larger due to infection.

2. Toothpaste

The hotel toothpaste doesn't work, as simple as that. No matter how hard you brush, you cannot make foam out of it. You start to wonder whether you have mistaken the lotion for toothpaste, in fact, they taste like it, too.

3. Shampoo and conditioner

Those shampoo/conditioner/body washer bottles contain essentially identical matters. I think those are made of recycled real shampoo, conditioner, body wash and soap. The shampoo can easily destroy your hair. Remember I once washed my hair with body wash before moving out of London? How my hair became tangled, sticky and hard as steel wire? That's how I feel about hotel shampoo.

4. Very strong body lotion

Because most hotel rooms are seriously sealed (afraid of guests jumping off the window?). The constantly activated aircondition is really bad for your skin. My case was a bit serious, I start to grow rashes all over my thighs and back. It was really hard to suppress the urge to scratch during the meeting.

5. Gloves and detergent

2 weeks is relative long time to go without clean socks, you read the price list of the laundry service, such as 5 dollars for a pair of socks, I think, most people would decide to make the 5 bucks by drawning them in the bathroom sink. It is really handy to have a pair of thick gloves (so you can use the extra hot water to make sure all the genes are killed) and the real detergent (strickly speaking, body soap smells nice but very weak in cleaning fabric).


to be continued....

Luxury Goods Heaven

Tokyo office are very socialable. Hiroko has taken me to play walleyball (not valleyball), drinking/eating was happening almost every day, I start to switch into vacation mode... Well, that makes me feel so guilty

We finished at least 10 bottles and started singing together on the street on our way back (I also provided the backup dancing entertainment).
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I think it has a lot to do with my upbringings, I always feel reluctant to pay extra bucks for quality, no matter how small the amount is. My mom had not demanded a lot about her living space until recently (trust me, you won't feel like to decorate your home if it is an open space for all your husband's relatives/friends/business partners). Besides, we had to live a very economical life. It doesn't seem wrong at that time, I thought every one is doing the same thing. Mankit and I grew up strong and healthy, no complaints.

During my personality molding period in Canada, the people I knew were mostly penny counting. Auntie Feng is the only exception, she is the true believer of "you have to treat yourself well". Anyways, some of my friends were co-op students, the work term's earning is used to pay for the study term. Some were VISA students, cutting down the living expense means less the burden on their parents' shoulders in Taiwan/HK.

It almost became a competition among us, how to sustain the minimum student life yet have great time. Things were not getting better after I started working. I don't know what my Toronto friends have become, but I still live in the poor grad-student mode although I can definitely afford to treat myself better.

If I am in the supermarket, I would be drawn to the SALE section by an unexplainable force. Although there is usually bad-looking fruits or almost-overdue produce. I always try to get the cheap cut even though the difference is less than 10 yuan (slightly more than a dollar). When shopping for shampoo, it is unthinkable for me to buy from the BODY SHOP or the alike. They are 3 times more expensive than those chemical-ridden, mass-production shampoo. But after reading the price tag, I have changed my mind and gone back to buy cheapo shampoo 3 or 4 times. I hope I can success in buying the natural, organic shampoo next time. After reading the price list of the laundry service in the hotel, I decided to wash them in the bath tub. This really doesn't make sense to me, because the client is paying. I cannot explain why I love to abuse myself for no one's benefit. Why I do not know how to justify the marginal values purchased by the extra money? Or if I know but don't want to admit it is going to make my life better?

I think this is really the key to my whole attitute about spending. I * AM * NOT * CONFIDENT *. I don't trust myself that I am making a good deal and it is going to make me happy. Perhaps I hate to be haunted by the "spending-unwisely" experience, I have unconsciously washed out all my shopping impulse?

I envy those who can spend few hundred bucks on a handbag or a jar of night cream. They are so certain about the what they want... I guess life is a series of decision making, and shopping is one of them. We are all trying to make the best bargain by gathering information, waiting for the right time and then strike. I think I am just lack of training in the shopping department.